Starlight
by EmilyEsmeGibson12
Summary: Esme is popular, beautiful and can have any guy she wants. Carlisle is new, handsome and secretive. Carlisle's a vampire and doesn't want to risk Esme's life by being with her, but sometimes true love is too strong to ignore.
1. Off to Prom

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met. **

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

"I can't believe you are making me do this," I grumbled as I walked out of the bathroom. The dress I was wearing was scarlet red and was very short. My caramel hair had been curled, bouncing up to my shoulders when I walked.

My best friend, Alice, clapped and smiled in triumphant when she saw her masterpiece. She had been the one who had bought the dress for me and done my hair, determined to make me even more uncomfortable. "You look amazing!"

I looked at the mirror. The girl looking back at me looked pale white, but that was only because of how unlucky I was when it came to tanning. She had long, silky hair that rolled past her shoulders, full lips with red lipstick covering them, her eyebrows were thinly plucked, her brown eyes wide with shock and surprise. Was that really me?

"Rosalie called when you were getting changed," Alice informed me as I slipped on the red heels she had let me borrow. "She said she and Bella were going to meet us at the prom."

The prom, I thought with a shudder. The night I had been dreading for ages, since we first started the school year. I wasn't like Alice or Rose or Bella, I didn't mind dancing, it was just the thought of wearing dresses and walking in heels that bothered me. I was so used to wearing jeans and jumpers! It wasn't fair!

"OK, cool." I said, looking around for my handbag. Alice had it. "Oh,"

She laughed. "You've got to calm down, Esme." She told me. "Everything will be fine."

"Do you know if those new kids will be there?" I asked, not meeting her gaze, afraid she would see that glimpse of worry. They always made me feel stupid, uncool, and clumsy. And I was one of the popular girls at school; no one made me feel like that.

Alice shrugged her shoulders. "I heard Olivia really wanted to go, so I guess they will be."

It had been two weeks since the Cullen's and the Hales had moved to Forks, Washington. They all had that elegant grace, the same chalky white skin, strange but amazing golden eyes and they were all beautiful. When they walked into a room, so graceful and proud, the crowd would part to let them go past, especially Olivia.

"Have you got your eyes on one of them?" Alice asked me, sounding amused. "Doesn't sound like you, Esme? I thought all boys here weren't good enough for you?"

"No," I said instantly. "Besides, I've only seen four of them. Their younger brother has been away, hasn't he?"

"Maybe the younger brother is cute," She said, putting on some more make-up.

"You have Jasper," I reminded her.

"I know, I was just saying. Maybe you could date the younger Cullen. Then we can all double-date - you and him, Jasper and I, Emmett and Rose, Bella and Edward. It would be fun!"

"You and I have very different definitions on the meaning of 'fun'." I said but I couldn't stop a smile from forming on my face.

She straightened when she had done. "You ready to go?"

I sighed. "I guess I am."

"Then let's go!"

"You're too enthusiastic," I warned. "You might hurt yourself dancing."

"Never!" She laughed and took my arm, dragging me out of the room and down the stairs.

"Goodbye you two, have fun!" Alice's mum called after us and we waved goodbye to her before we left.

The two of us climbed into Alice's car and I started tapping my fingers on the door handle, ready to run if things when wrong. Alice turned up the music so she didn't have to hear my nervous tapping.

Forks High School was a ten minute drive from my house along the highway, but soon Alice and I started talking again and time passed even more quicker. I knew what the topic of the conversation would be even more she opened her mouth, the new kids.

"What do you think of them?" She asked me, eyes on the road.

"Well, I think Olivia is a show-off, but she could be nice and kind if you got to know her. Jack, I wouldn't like to get on the wrong side of, he's huge! Sophia seems a lot like you actually, into fashion and very excitable - and she's so thin! It's like she is a walking twig! And Michael, well, he always looks like he is in pain, haven't you noticed?"

She nodded. "Yeah, I agree with you on everything but one, I don't think Olivia could be nice. No way!"

"She could be," We hadn't even spoken to the new kids, no one had. They like to keep to themselves, just sitting in the canteen with platefuls of food that they wouldn't even touch. And they would just sit so still, like statues.

"I guess we'll never know. It's not like they want to talk to any of us."

"We shouldn't bother ourselves about that though." I reminded her.

She smiled. "We're right. We're popular now, we're at the top. They can sulk and stare all the want. We're better than them."

I laughed. Alice knew how to cheer me up.

Somehow she managed to find a space in the busy car park outside of school and we got out, careful of our dresses. Rosalie Hannon and Bella Swan, our two other best friends, came rushing forward to meet us outside of the hall.

Rosalie was wearing a beautiful designer satin blue dress, which, like mine, was cut short on purpose. She wore her hair up in a bun that was shaped beautifully. Her mother was hairdresser, so the perfect hair was not much of a surprise.

Bella's dress was lavender and she had her hair in the same style she always had it in, long an straight without any knots or kinks. It all suited her well and I was glad that she was like me and didn't like to show off that much.

"You guys ready for the best time of your life?" Rosalie asked, glancing back at the hall where you could hear the music pounding and people laughing and cheering. "It looks great this year,"

Together the four of us walked into the hall. The whole year must have been there, dancing along to the music. The DJ threw his hand in the air and the crowd waved back, shouting for more music to be played.

Emmett, Jasper and Edward, all wearing tuxes, were stood at the food bar eating and talking, probably about the game that was on last night. Before I knew what was happening, I was being led into the crowd of dancers by Rose and the others. I actually enjoyed myself, dancing with them and shouting with the rest of the crowd until my throat hurt afterwards. I clapped and cheered and had a good time.

Then the crowd stopped dancing suddenly and turned to stare. I followed their gaze, already knowing what it was leading towards.

Five figures were stood under the open doors of the hall, all wearing stunning clothes. Olivia had a pink dress, shoes with about three inches of heel which she seemed perfectly comfortable in and was good at balancing.

Her sister, Sophia, had her auburn hair pulled into a plait, and she was wearing a white dress with black at the bottom, it looked like grass in a way. She gave a little twirl and the black blurred so it looked like a river.

The boys were wearing grey tuxes, looking smart and handsome, their hair neatly styled into a disarray on their heads. Jack had a big grin on his face and he led Olivia towards the dancing, his hand so big that it covered hers completely.

That was when I noticed the five figure for the first time.

Unlike his two dark-haired brothers, the third boy had blonde hair. This was the only difference he had though. Like the others, he was beautiful, white-skinned, golden-eyed, and looked like a movie-star. I noticed that he didn't have a date, that he stayed where he was standing, looking around with narrowed eyes.

Then his eyes landed on me.

I looked away, blushing, and turned back to Alice. "Who's that?" I asked, trying not to blush any further.

"Carlisle Cullen, I guess." She answered with a shrug of her shoulders.

I looked back at him and my head shot back to Alice quickly when I realized his eyes were still on mind. Great, now I feel really, really uncomfortable.

For five minutes I tried to ignore him and was thankful when the music stopped and we went over to Emmett and the boys for a few minutes. Carlisle's eyes followed me.

"What does Cullen want?" Emmett demanded, although defensive and ready to beat up anyone who annoyed me or the others.

I shrugged.

"He is really good looking." Rosalie commented. Emmett glared at her. She shrugged. "What? It's true."

I couldn't help look back at him. He was talking to Olivia and Sophia, although he looked past his shoulder at me. I looked away and so did he. I blushed, no color came to his cheeks.

"Come on, let's get something to eat." Alice decided and we all left the ball room and headed for the room where they would store the gym objects like netball poles and skipping ropes. All the objects had been moved out and replaced with tables covered in food. I took a ham sandwich and took a tiny bite out of it.

"Are you alright, Esme?" Bella asked, sounding worried.

I nodded, picking at the ham with my fingers. "Sure, I'm good."

She was unconvinced. "Maybe you need some fresh air. Come on, let's go outside for a minute."

I sighed and followed her out of the gym. She led me down to the field and we sat on the bench.

She flattened out her dress and asked, "So, what's going on?"

"I don't know. That's what's troubling me. Ever since he walked through the room I can't think!"

"Since who walked in the room?" She titled her head to one side and I knew she was trying to figure it out in her head,

I sat there in silence, trying to count each strand of grass

My head snapped up when Bella gasped. "Carlisle Cullen!?"

I looked back at the grass. "You made me loose count." I grumbled.

"Esme, do you like Carlisle?" She asked.

I shook my head instantly. "No! I'm not one of those girls who sees a guy and falls in love with him just because he is handsome! I've never spoken to him, for all I know he could be mean and a show-off. I don't know him!"

"Then why are you acting so awkward and uncomfortable?" She pressed.

I sighed. "I don't know."

She touched my arm. "I'm here for you if you need me. And you know Emmett and the guys will sort him out if he makes you feel more uncomfortable. I did see him staring at you a lot back there."

I tried not to be excited by the fact that he had been staring at me. "Really?" My attempt of keeping my voice steady and calm was a poor one.

Bella nodded, starting to smile. "It's like he can't keep his eyes off you!"

"Maybe it's just the dress, or the fact he was checking to see if I wasn't staring at him or...what?"

Bella was looking at me with wide, bright eyes. "Esme, don't you see it? You like him!"

"I just met him!"

"Esme and Carlisle kissing in a tree," She started to sing, clapping as well.

I hissed at her. "Shut-up! And I don't like him."

"What if he likes you?"

"If he liked me he would have come over to me, wouldn't he?" I asked, rolling my eyes.

"You know what I think you should do?"

I looked up at her and felt scared. She had that glint in her eye, like she always did when she had just thought of a 'great' idea. Well, an idea she would would be great and often ended badly. "What?"

"Go back in that dance room and have fun. Show him that you aren't interested. It will drive him crazy and he'll work out that you won't walk over to him, so he'll have to come over to you if he wants to know your name. It's genius!"

I groaned. "That's what you say every time and then it never works!"

"Trust me," She touched her temple. "I've thought this through."

"Oh, now I'm reassured!" I laughed bitterly. "It's not going to work. He doesn't care who I am."

"Then why was he staring at you all the time? Answer me that."

I shrugged, searching desperately for something to say. "Maybe I had something on my face."

"Come on. Try it, see if it works!"

I sighed, giving in. "OK fine, but only because I don't have a jacket and it's freezing cold out here!"


	2. Dare Game

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met. **

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

"There you two are!" Jasper called. The four of them, Jasper, Emmett, Edward and Alice, were stood in the corner of the food room talking to each other, but Jasper broke apart from them as we approached. "We're playing dare."

"You forgot about 'truth'." I let him know.

He rolled his eyes. "We know, but Emmett wanted to play dare because it is more fun. Come on."

Bella and I glanced at each other before following him to the others. Right now, Edward was daring Emmett to do something.

"I dare you to change the music and make sure the head teacher sees you." Edward dared.

Emmett grinned. "What music?"

"The goofiest song on the tracklist." Edward said and Emmett rushed off.

"I wonder what song he'll pick." Rosalie mumbled.

A second later, the chosen song played. It was 'Hey, Mickey!' and we all laughed. Emmett came back a few seconds later with a big grin on his face.

"Did Mr Greene catch you?" I asked, picturing the face that the head teacher would have worn when Emmett changed the music.

Emmett nodded. "Detention on Monday." He gave Edward a loud high-five. "Right, my dare is for all the girls."

I straightened. "Name it," Rosalie said bravely.

Emmett's grin stretched even more. "I dare you to go up onto stage and dance to the next song that is played."

"On the stage?" Alice echoed. "Only the show-offs go on there."

Edward put his hand on Rosalie's shoulder and teased, "You'll fit right in, then." She shrugged him off and glowered at him.

"Oh, come on." I said, surprising myself. "We only have one prom, might as well make it fun."

"Right," Bella agreed, that same glint in her eyes as before. I tried not to let that bother me, but I couldn't help wonder what she was planning.

"I'm so watching this." Edward laughed.

"Can we get changed first into something more...dance-comfortable?" I requested.

"And your just going to drive home to get some jeans and t-shirts?" Emmett looked rather amused.

I rolled my eyes at him. "Of course not, we have spare clothes in our lockers."

Rosalie nodded. "Be back in five minutes guys. That song we have to dance to better be a good one."

Then we headed out of the hall and down the corridors, stopping at our lockers.

I pulled out my pink jeans and white sleeveless top out of my locker, then went into the girls bathroom to get changed. I felt much more calm and relaxed in casual clothes. I folded up my dress and placed it inside the locker. The others did the same and we headed back to the ball room.

Like me, the others were wearing coloured jeans and their tops were sleeveless. The guys watched as we walked onto the stage. Rosalie glared the others before they left. Edward was right, she could be a real show-off sometimes!

Then the music played.

"Oh my god!" Rosalie clapped as 'Wannabe' by the Spice Girls played. "Remember our dance to this from the fourth grade?"

We all nodded and started dancing. It was so easy to remember all the dance moves when it brought back so many happy memories. The crowd all stopped dancing to watch. Then they started to clap and cheer, the guys making sure they were the loudest.

I looked at Alice and we both laughed.

I almost froze when I realized who's eyes were locked on me. Carlisle stood with his brothers and sisters, the girls had turned their backs on us and were trying to capture the boys attention, but Carlisle was looking right at me. My heart started to beat much louder and faster then it ever had and I had to remind myself that I was still dancing.

"Make it last forever, friendship never ends!" Rosalie and Bella was starting to sing along and Alice and I joined in, followed by the rest of the crowd.

I was sure that the teachers, some of them, were bobbing along to the music as well but were all too proud to start dancing.

"Again! Again!" The crowd chanted as the song drew to an end and we stopped dancing. Rosalie was blowing kisses at random boys and Bella was waving.

'On the floor' started to play, by Jennifer Lopez ft. Pitball and before I knew what was happening the others were dancing and I quickly followed.

Rosalie and I, because we went to dance club where we had practiced this song, were suddenly at the front of the stage with Alice and Bella behind us, and were leading the dance with the other two coping our movements.

Even though it was a little embarrassing still to be up here dancing in front of hundreds of eyes, especially _his _eyes, but I was having fun and laughing. I wasn't even out of breath, I just wanted to have fun with my friends right now, so I tried to ignore the fact that he was still watching.

We were allowed off the stage after another dance, this time to 'Run this town' by Rihanna, Jay-Z and Kanye West. We joined the guys at the back of the room.

"Very good," Emmett appraised, nodding. "I did only dare you to do one song, but I'm not complaining."

"I didn't know you girls were such dancers." Edward said, kissing Bella's cheek.

"Are we continuing the game?" Bella asked.

Everyone nodded.

"I'll go next." Bella said before anyone could offer to go next instead. Once her eyes fell on me I knew what the dare was going to be. "Esme, I dare you to go and talk to Carlisle Cullen."

Five pairs of eyes were on me now and I felt red in the face.

"Cullen?" Edward sounded confused. "Why would she dare you to speak to him?"

"I don't know." I said quickly before Bella could answer instead. "How long do I have to talk to him?" I asked Bella. I just wanted to get it over with.

She smiled. "Five minutes. I'll wave at you when it's over, since you don't have a watch."

I sighed. "OK, but you are so dead when I come back." Turning on my heels I walked away into the crowd of dancers, trying to figure out how I would approach him.

Olivia and the others were now dancing, which made me more relaxed. Carlisle was stood by the table where the punch was served. No one was there getting a drink. I headed over and focused on the drink, not meeting his eyes for I worried I would forget how to speak English if I saw them.

"You thirsty from all that dancing?" He asked me as I took a glass and poored punch into it.

I froze. He was talking to me? Oh well, at least that meant I wouldn't have to awkwardly start the conversation. His voice was velvet soft and musical. I envied it.

I looked up at him, knowing I had to. His eyes were different. They weren't golden anymore.

They were pitch black.

I pushed the curiosity away when I realized he was waiting for me to say something. I nodded. "Yes,"

"That was some great dancing you were doing." He said with a little smile.

Was it hot in here? Or was that just me?

"Um...thanks?" I said, not knowing what else to say.

We stood there in silence for a moment, just looking at each other. I could feel the gazes of several people watching. They were probably wondering why the two of us, completely different from one another, were talking.

"Are you thirsty?" I asked, gesturing towards the punch as I remembered he wasn't drinking anything. He hadn't drunk anything all night, or ate. What was it with his family and not eating?"

"No, thank you." He said. His voice sounded strained. Huh. His eyes moved from my voice to my clothes. "Are you going to stay in those all nights or change back into your dress?"

I shrugged. "Might get changed later."

"You find the dress uncomfortable?" He guessed.

"No," I lied. "I just prefer casual jeans and tops."

"Me too," He agreed. "The dress looked nice on you by the way."

I blushed and thought I saw the corners of his mouth twitch as if he was about to smile.

I saw Bella start to move from the group and wave at me. Had it been five minutes already?

Carlisle noticed this as well. "I think your friend wants you."

I nodded. "Well...er, see ya."

"Goodbye...?" He was waiting for me to say my name.

"Esme," I said before disappearing into the crowd.

Bella greeted me half-way and dragged me towards the others. "How did it go?"

"Fine," I said.

"What did you talk about?" Rosalie asked. The guys, not really wanting to listen to us girls gossip about the youngest Cullen, went off somewhere, probably to eat some more and talk about cars.

"Not much,"

"I didn't give you enough time, did I?" Bella sounded angry, at herself.

"No, I'm glad you showed up when you did, as I didn't know what to say to him. He knows my name now."

"You told him your name?" Alice cocked her head to one side. "That's not like you, Esme."

She was right. I didn't give boys my real name whenever I could help it, I would often make up random names if I knew the relationship was going nowhere and fast.

"He asked," I shrugged.

"He was the one who asked?"

"Yes," I stared at her, a little confused. "Why is that so important?"

"He's into you!" Rosalie said in delight.

"What?" I felt so stupid, they all knew, or thought they did, what that meant, and I there I was without a clue.

"He was the one asked, you didn't have to tell him. Oh wow!"

"Please, can someone explain what is going on?"

Rosalie rolled her eyes. "He wanted to know your name. He's interested."

"I say you go speak to him again, and soon." Bella added enthusiastic.

"You three are reading too much into it. He only asked me for my name!"

"You are so clueless, Esme!" Alice groaned.

Rosalie glanced at Bella, who smiled. "Are you sure there is nothing going on between Carlisle and you? You don't feel anything him?"

I shook my head. "Nothing at all."

"Good, because we have a game for you to play."

I let out a exasperated sigh. "Another game?"

"This isn't a dare game though. It's a dating game, just for you."

"Great," I don't think they had heard the sarcasm that laced my voice, or just chose to ignore it. "What's the game about?"

"Well, we are all going out on this big group dinner, but it's a couples thing. You have to get a date before Monday,"

"Five days," I said. "You want me to just pick a guy and go out with him?"

"If you do, we will all give you ten dollars."

"And what do you get out of it?"

Alice spoke next. "You've been single for too long. We want you to find someone,"

"So you'd just let anyone go out with me?"

"No, we'd make sure he was good enough and warn you about anything bad. We just hate seeing you alone when we are out with our boyfriends."

I sighed. "Alright, I'm in."


	3. The List

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

I had planned everything perfectly - which showed how bored I really was.

First I made a list of every single boy in my year, then started crossing out the names of the boys I didn't like and highlighting the 'maybes' and then putting little circles by the 'alrights'. I hated doing homework, but I didn't mind these kind of homework.

"Explain to me again why I am doing this." My brother, Larry, asked as he helped me create the board, like the ones they had in those movies where they are trying to find someone. Ethan knew all about that sort of stuff, the spy things, and he was pretty smart for a thirteen year old.

"Because you are a nice, helpful little brother." I said.

"I want to get paid for this." He decided.

"I'm not giving you any money." I told him. "So get that thought out of your head right now."

He folded his hands around his chest. "Then I'm not helping you!"

"I'll give you five chocolate bars - six if you finish that by tonight."

He huffed. "Deal, I guess I can trade them in for money."

"If you want a dollar or two, just as mom." I told him, flicking through the year book at the boys pictures. Some of them were awful, others were alright, but only one stood out. Carlisle.

I sighed and closed the book, falling back on the bed, my head hitting the pillows.

Larry looked up at me from where he was sat surrounded in pens, pencils, paper and cardboard. "I doubt they would give me a hundred dollars."

I nearly choked. "And you thought I would give you a hundred dollars for making me a board? I don't even have ten dollars right now!"

He stuck his tongue out at me. "That's because you spent it all shopping with Rosalie last weekend!"

I rolled my heads. "Why do you need a hundred dollars anyway?"

"I want to buy this telescope, but I don't have enough money."

"Why would you want to a telescope for when we have Google Images on the laptops?" I asked, throwing a tennis ball in the air and catching it.

Larry looked at the floor. "Because Daddy always said that if we lost him, he would be watching us from the stars."

I swallowed. The sadness in his voice cut me like a blade. Getting up, I went over to my brother and sat down next to him, wrapping my arms around him. "Larry, it's been eight years, I thought you had gotten over it."

"You have though, haven't you?" He asked. "Because you go out with your friends afterschool, go to parties and sleepovers on the weekend, you've forgotten about Daddy."

"That's not true. I do remember him, and I miss him, but I found out that missing him won't bring him back. I know it's hard, I know it's horrible, but we have to move on with our lives. That's what dad would have wanted."

He sighed. "Your right."

I didn't expect him to move on so quickly, I never had. Dad had been in his life since he was born, it wasn't the same for me.

I squeezed his arm gently. "What do you say to us finishing this thing with a pizza and some curly fries?"

"You would eat pizza?" He asked, stunned.

"I can take a break from my diet," Rosalie and I were trying to loose another stone before the year ended, so when we went to Alice's beach house on the summer holidays we looked great.

He looked thoughtful and then nodded. "OK, sounds cool."

"What pizza would you like?" I asked, reaching for the phone. Our mom was out, so I was in charge of feeding Larry, but she didn't say I had to cook the food myself. Besides, she had left me a twenty anyway.

"Pepperoni." He answered straight away. "And ham!"

"OK, and you know what, you can keep the change, how's that."

He smiled. "Only ninety-eight dollars to go!"

By the end of the night, after finishing two pieces between us and a portion of curly fries, we had managed to get the board finished. I helped larry with his homework and made him ice-cream and pancakes for desert, which, even after how much pizza and fries he ate, he didn;t leave any leftovers. After I put Larry to bed, I went back to my room and started on the board picking out the ones I would take seriously.

In the end I was left with four normal, nice enough guys.

Mike Newton - I didn't know him that well, but I heard from Bella that he was nice and a good friend (she sometimes hung out with him and his gang after school whenever they invited her down to La Push) and that he was fun to be around. His parents owned Newtons Olympic Outfitters and I knew he helped out there with Bella. Edward wasn't too pleased at first about the amount of time they spent together, but Bella soon convinced him that she only thought of Mike as a friend, nothing more and nothing less.

Tyler Crowly - he was part of Mike's gang. Bella often hung out with him as well (I phoned her out about these two guys and wrote down everything she said) and she said that he was like Mike, nice and friendly, but he was also a troublemaker. He often got in detention, but was said to light up the detention room with jokes and laughter. He sounded alright, but he didn't seem that serious about relationships. He had been out with all the girls in his little gang, their relationship only lasting a week or two before they broke up, and then after Tyler would end things with his new girlfriend he would go back to the old ones.

Wait, why should I care if he was serious about a relationship or not when I wasn't either? It was just a date for one night, then I could end things and never speak of it again. But I had gone out with Tyler once, years ago when we were seven, and he was very immature. No, he was off the list. I crossed out his name. This limited me down to three boys.

Austin Marks - Bella didn't know him that well, so she wasn't much help with that. I phoned Rosalie and asked her, and her exact words were 'You can do so much better than him, Esme. Anyway, I don't think I should be helping you with this, sorry, but it is your dare.' and then she had hung up. She wasn't that helpful, but she did have a point. Bella asked me if I would like it if she talked to Austin and find out what he was like, but I told her that she shouldn't be wasting her time. Maybe I should be the one to get to know Austin better.

The final option was one I wasn't so sure about.

Carlisle - was I crazy?! I wasn't even sure why I had bothered putting him on this list. Even if I had enough courage to speak to him and ask him out, I didn't have the strength to get over his rejection. Why had I put him on the list? I shouldn't have even felt a little flicker of hope that he might actually like me and want to go on a date with me. I didn't cross out his name though, I just stayed at it.

I didn't know what time it was, but I knew I fell asleep before my mom got home. So it must have been past midnight.


	4. Lunch with Carlisle

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

We were late for Biology. I knew we were, so did Rosalie, but that didn't make us walk any faster down the corridor, even though the head-teachers eyes were following eyes to make sure we didn't ditch school completely.

"Rose, can I ask you something?" I asked her as we walked up the staircase.

She nodded. "Sure, anything."

"When you first met Emmett, what did you feel?"

She looked a little surprised at my question, and I didn't blame her, and then she smiled. "I couldn't get him out of my mind. He was always there, when I closed my eyes, whenever I was alone. He was that star in the play that aired in my mind every second of the day."

I swallowed.

"Why did you ask?" She asked, sounding concerned. Then she nudged me. "Esme Platt, have you met someone?"

I bit my lower lip. "Maybe."

"Tell me! Screw Biology, this is more important. Who is he? Does he go to this school?"

Great, the explaining. "Yes, he does. He has blonde hair and golden eyes."

"Golden eyes?" She asked, then gasped. "Not Carlisle!"

"Keep your voice down!" I hissed and she shut up, but she was still smiling. "And I don't know if I like him or not."

"Ask him out!" She suggested. "Next time you see him, just ask him out."

"I can't do that!"

"Yes, you can. If your scared that he will say no, just show him that you don't care."

I swallowed. "You really think I should?"

She nodded. "Yes!"

I was waiting in the line at the cafeteria, tapping my fingers on the tray as I waited impatiently.

"Mind if I stand with you?" A warm, familiar voice said from behind me.

I turned to see Carlisle Cullen standing there. I forgot for a second how to speak English, then recovered. "Um, sure."

"Oi," Mike Newton strolled over, his tray already full, with Tyler and Eric Yorkie on either side of him. "No cuts, back of the line."

"He's with me, OK Mike? You've already got your food, so if you don't want to have to wash custard out of your hair, you'll stop complaining and move on." I said boldly.

Mike looked at me, stunned that I was defending him, and shot one glare at Carlisle before moving off.

"Your friends seem...nice." Carlisle commented once they were out of earshot.

"There not my friends." I answered through clenched teeth. Boy Mike Newton got on my nerves! "I just put up with them because of Bella."

"Well, I appreciate what you did back there. Everyone is like that because we are new." He admitted.

My eyes widened. "I didn't know that. I'm sorry. I guess the last thing you guys needed when you moved over here was everyone being so cold towards you just because you are new. I know what that's like, I moved over here ten years ago."

"But now you are popular." He finished, then smiled. "So I guess there is still hope for us."

I could see Rosalie watching carefully, not listening to anything that Emmett was saying. She mouthed 'go for it' but I didn't. This was easy, talking to him, well it was easier than it had been at prom.

We were at the front of the line now and someone coughed behind us to tell us that.

I quikcly got some water and a sandwich. "Aren't you getting anything?" I asked Carlisle, who didn't have anything on his food and didn't even look at the sandwiches or drinks in front of him. He was looking at me.

He shook his head. "No, I'm not hungry."

"Then why did you ask me if you could stand with me in the line?" I questioned.

He smiled a beautiful smile, showing a set of perfectly white teeth. "I guess I just wanted to get to know you better."

I swallowed, growing hot. Was I blushing? "Err, if you wanted to, you could have lunch with us. Only if you want to, I will perfectly understand if you don't." Liar.

He looked a little uncomfortable. "Um, would your friends mind?"

"Yes, mostly likely. But they'll get over themselves." I wished inside my head that he would agree.

I was relieved when he smiled. "OK, let me just tell Olivia."

I nodded, waiting for him to leave. "Your not going yet?"

"What kind of gentleman would I be if I just ditched you?" He asked and we walked towards the counter.

"That will be 3 dollars." The dinner-lady replied in a bored voice. No wonder, this job was pretty boring-looking.

I searched through my purse. "Dammit, I left my money with Rose!"

"Don't worry, I'll pay." Before I could protest, Carlisle was giving the dinnerlady the money and picked up my lunch for me.

I took the tray back. "You didn't have to do that."

"Yes, I did. It wouldn't have been very polite of me if I hadn't." He looked over his shoulder. "We better go, there's a line forming."

I nodded and walked towards the table, Carlisle at my side. "I will pay you back." I told him, sitting down next to Emmett, who gave me a confused look, as if asking me why Carlisle had followed me to the table.

"Don't rush, it was just three dollars." Carlisle said with a shrug and then turned towards where Olivia and the rest of his family were.

I watched Olivia's face as he explained about where he would be having lunch. She didn't look pleased, like a mother who had just received a call from the head teacher saying that her son was excluded for two weeks. In fact, none of the Cullen's looked happy about it, the boys glanced over their shoulders at me from time to time while Carlisle continued explaining.

A prod in the ribs brought my attention back to the table. "What?" I demanded.

"Why is Cullen following you around?" Jasper asked.

Emmett gave a growl. "If he's stalking you, I can sort him out.

"No!" I gasped. "It isn't like that, don't beat him up! He was just being nice."

"Cullen, being nice? Well that's something you don't hear every day." Edward sniffed.

Jasper nodded. "I didn't even know the Cullen's talked to anyone but their siblings." He said.

"Stop that! He really isn't a bad guy, he's nice. And maybe the Cullen's would talk to other people at this school if everyone wasn't so unfriendly towards them!" I hissed.

They all looked at me in shock and surprise.

Emmett rolled his eyes. "You talk to the guy for a few minutes and your already defending him."

"I'm not defending him!" I argued poorly. "I was just trying to prove a point."

They all turned back to their trays and I knew why. Carlisle was walking over. He sat down beside me and turned so he faced me. "Sorry I took so long, Olivia was being stubborn. She doesn't like the new seating arrangement. She thinks its...never mind."

I looked at the others, mad that they hadn't welcomed Carlisle. "We don't mind." I said.

He smiled and looked at the sandwich, which was untouched. "Aren't you going to eat that?"

I nodded. "Yeah, but I was talking a minute ago." Picking up the sandwich I bit into it, making sure it was a small bite. I saw Jasper and Edward exchange glances, Edward rolling his eyes before looking away.

Carlisle looked satisfied when I finished the sandwich. He gave me a napkin to whip my hands and mouth with. "Are you still hungry? Because I can go and get you something else."

"No," I shook my head. "I'm fine,"

Carlisle glanced over his shoulder at were his siblings sat. Olivia met his steady gaze with a glare that could kill. Then her furious eyes turned on me and I felt as if they were burning a hole through my skin.

"Don't mind her," Carlisle said, capturing my attention. "She gets like that sometimes. Do you have a sister? Or a brother?"

I nodded, thankful that he could distract me so well. "I have a little brother named Larry, and a sister, Grace, but she's in college right now. She comes back home on terms, sometimes."

"That must be tough, not seeing her everyday."

"It was at first." I admitted, barely noticing the sympathy in his voice. If it was anyone but Carlisle, I would have had a go at them for feeling sorry for me. "I couldn't sleep. But soon, over time, it just got normal, like she had always been away. She still writes and emails, and sometimes she'll call."

In my opinion, the bell for the end of lunch went off too quickly.

"Come on, Esme." Edward said, getting up and putting one arm around Bella's shoulder. "We've got English next."

I nodded.

"Who's your English teacher?" Carlisle asked me, rising to his feet so quickly that I didn't even see him get up. He held out one hand. I placed mine inside it and he helped me up.

It took me a minute to remember. "Mrs Frost."

"Same," He said, with what looked like a tiny smile.

"Do you want to walk to class with us?" I asked.

"I'm not going to class." He admitted.

"Are you sick?"

He shook his head, chuckling. "No, we're kind of...ditching."

"Ditching?"

"What, don't the popular people do that as well?" He teased.

"We used to," Emmett was determined not to be out-done. "But Mr Greene keeps a close eye on us now." That was true, we did use to ditch about five times a week, but Mr Greene soon caught on and now went searching for us during lessons to make sure we were there.

Carlisle nodded. "Well, he hasn't caught us yet."

"Where are you going?" I asked.

He shrugged. "We split up."

"Oh,"

Something was tugging on my arm. "Come on Esme, Mr Greene will be looking for us soon, and I don't really want to have any detention with him again this week." Rosalie said.

"I'll see you tomorrow." Carlisle said softly to me. "Bye, Esme." Then he turned and headed towards his brothers and sisters. They left the canteen and were on their way to the car park so quickly it was like they were jogging.

I watched as the door closed slowly to a shut.


	5. La Push this Friday?

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

"So is Cullen having lunch with us today?" Edward demanded as we walked from French. I rolled my eyes. I had already been asked that by Rosalie and Emmett (although Rosalie had looked quite pleased)

"First of all, his name isn't 'Cullen' it is Carlisle." I said,glaring, my voice a little louder than I had wanted it to be. "And second, you guys have got to stop being so cold towards him."

"Carlisle," Edward snorted, spitting the name in disgust.

"And yes, he is having lunch with us." I answered his earlier question in a calmer voice. I didn't want to fight with Edward. Besides Jacob Black - who I hardly saw or spoke to in the week because he went to school on the reservation - Edward was my best guy friend.

"Great," He said with a voice heavy with sarcasm. I didn't see him roll his green eyes, but I knew he had.

I flashed another glare at him. "Besides, when did you start to care who had lunch with us?"

"Since you invited Cul...Carlisle over." He retorted.

"I don't see why you guys don't like him." I continued. "He is nice, once you get to know him."

Edward chuckled. "You've only met the guy for ten minutes! Anyay, you won't see me trying to get to know him, you can count on that."

I sighed, knowing that that would be the only answer I was going to get from him. I decided to change the subject before I said something that would offend him and his hair. "I'm going to phone Jake tonight, when I get back from Rosalie's - you remember Jacob Black right?"

Edward nodded. "Yes," He and Jacob were quite close, they would talk about fishing and cars whenever we met them down at La Push beach.

"Well I was going to ask if he wanted to come to the movies Friday after school. We can bring Emmett and the others, and Jake can bring his friends from the reservation."

"Remind me of his friends names again." Edward ordered, clicking his fingers and trying to remember himself.

"Embry, Quil, Paul, Jared, Sam, Brady and Collin." I replied. "And I was also going to ask if he wanted to bring the girlfriends with him - I haven't seen Emily, Kim and Rachel in so long. Oh, and maybe Leah would like to come." Although I had to admit that the chance of Leah Clearwater wanting come was slim.

Edward was thinking of something else. "That might be too big of a group for the cinema - it could get pricey."

Oh right, I had forgotten. "Then we don't have to go to the movies, we could just go down to the beach for a bonfire and surfing."

"You would go surfing?" He was clearly amused.

I shook my head instantly. "No, but I'll watch."

He nodded as if that had been the answer he had been expecting anyway. "I heard that Kim was a good surfer."

"She might give you guys a run for your money." I said teasingly.

His eyes flashed with amusement and he played along. "I'm not that bad at surfing, thank you very much."

"Last time I saw you, you could hardly stand on the board!"

"That was a month ago!"

I'd forgotten again. "Has it really been that long since we last spoke to Jacob?"

He nodded. "I guess with prom, it's been a little hard to fit a visit to La Push in. You girls do shop a lot!"

I gave him a playful nudge as we walked into the canteen. I couldn't not feel disappointed when I saw that the table where the Cullen's sat was empty. Surely with their unnatural walking-pace they would be the first into the canteen? Were their classes running late? I knew that all of them couldn't be in the same class, at it would be a funny coinsidence if all their classes were late at the same time, but they could be waiting for their siblings...?

I sat next to Jasper and Rosalie, who were eating pizza and talking.

"Not hungry today, Essie?" Emmett called me by my nickname they had given me from second grade. A teacher had pronounced by real name wrong, and 'Essie' had stuck.

I shook my head, not bothering to remind him how much I disliked that nickname. "No, I had a big breakfast."

"How's your mom?" Alice asked, concern in her eyes. Everyone at this table knew that my mom had taken the death of my father hard at first, but now was out partying all night with her friends at bars and nightclubs, leaving me with Larry.

"She didn't come home till five this morning, a new record." I said dully, I kept glancing at the door and wondering when the Cullen's would walk in. I turned back to Alice, knowing that she was pretty perspective. "She's probably still asleep on the couch."

"Does she know you are coming round mine after school?" Rosalie asked.

I nodded. "I left a note, but asked the neighbor to pick up Larry for me because I know mom will forget."

Rosalie smiled comforting at me and Jasper squeezed my arm with a reassuring look.

"Anyway, shall I tell them the plan for this weekend, Esme, or will you?" Edward asked, clearly trying to cheer me up.

"I will," I said and told them all about the plans with Jacob and his gang at the beach.

They all grinned when they heard that Jacob and his pack of friends would be there, especially the guys. They always had surfing competitions and played football with them.

Alice was cheerful as well. "Great! I needed to ask Rachel something anyway."

"I'll call him when I get home." I promised.

Then the door I had forgotten to watch swung open. Olivia, looking stunning in her shorts and floral top, walked in with Sophia, who was also wearing shorts. I noticed that their legs were really white - I guess I should have known, what with the colour of their face - and the skin looked hard, like it was made of marble. The boys followed them, wearing casual jeans and tops. Carlisle was the last one in and shut the door behind him, he was wearing black trousers and a grey v-neck sweater that, I noticed with a little smile, showed off all the muscles and lines of his stomach. The girls in the canteen, apart from the ones on my table, looked ready to melt when they saw this as well.

Carlisle looked over at me and I smiled in greeting. He gave a little nod of his head and followed his siblings to their table, none of them going into the canteen to get something to eat or drink. Where they never hungry or thirsty?

"I guess his sister got to him before you did." Edward commented.

I remembered that look Olivia had given Carlisle and I as we sat next to each other in lunch yesterday. "I don't see why she was so unhappy about the fact he ate with us yesterday."

"Well, we ate, he just sat and talked to you." Emmett pointed out.

I sighed. "Olivia doesn't like me."

"I don't think that's the reason she is mad at Carlisle for sitting here yesterday, because he wanted to sit with you." Alice shook her head. "I watched her and saw that she had almost a protective look on her face. They do care about each other a lot."

Again I let out a sigh. "I guess."

"But let's not get too hurt over it." Edward said, making me turn away from the Cullen's, Carlisle's eyes still on me. As I turned my back on him he also moved to talk to Michael, I think. "So, La Push this Friday, everyone in?"

They all nodded. "We're in!"


	6. A Chevy truck as a thankyou

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

"Have you made any progress on the dating thing? Monday's four days away." Rosalie reminded me. "And you might need fifty dollars."

We were in her room while we tried on the clothes we had just bought. She was standing in front of her mirror admiring the outfit she had picked out.

"Not really, but I'm working on it. If all goes badly, I have a back-up plan, Mike."

"Mike Newton? Wow, you must really want that fifty dollars." Rosalie laughed.

"Fifty dollars could come in handy, like you said." I shrugged.

"But Mike is your back-up plan. Who is your actual plan?"

"I don't know. I just know it isn't Mike Newton."

She laughed again. "What about Carlisle? First I thought you liked him, then you didn't care that he didn't have lunch with us earlier. What happened with him?"

"I'm not asking him out. You heard what Alice said about Olivia, protective. If Carlisle found out I was using him, even though I might enjoy the date and want to try it again, Olivia would claw my eyes out!"

"True," Then her eyes glowed. "Why don't you become friends with him first? Maybe he isn;t the one for this Monday, but maybe another date soon?"

Although the idea of having Carlisle as more than a friend of mine was tempting and made me smile, I wasn't sure. "Maybe,"

* * *

"What are you doing?" Larry asked me as I dialed the number into the phone. He was standing in the doorway to my room stuffing his face with potato chips.

"Phoning Jake," I said, then eyed the bowl of chips. "How did you get those?"

"I used a chair. You thought putting them in the top cabinet would actually stop me from reaching them, somehow!" He chuckled, stuffing another chip in my mouth before he had even swallowed.

"Lovely," I commented, feeling sick. "I was going to cook dinner after I phoned Jake."

Larry snorted. "I'll still eat it. What are we having?"

"Your having whatever I can find in the fridge." I said.

Larry left the room and I pressed the 'call' button on the phone, waiting for someone to pick up.

"Hello?" An old, low voice answered.

"Hi Billy!" I said, remembering that voice belonged to Billy Black, Jacob's father.

"Oh, hey Esme." He said.

"Is Jake there?" I asked.

"Sure, hang on, I'll go get him."

I listened to the sound of Billy shouting Jake's name and the phone getting passed over. Then Jake's warm, familiar voice sounded. "Esme!"

"Hye Jake. I know I haven't called for a while, and I'm sorry. But we were wondering if we could meet up with you and your friends in La Push this Friday." I waited for his reply.

"That sounds cool. Sure, I'll tell the others at school tomorrow. Jared and Paul will be pleased, they still haven't gotten over the fact that Emmett and Jasper beat them at football last time. Do you want us to drive to your school on Friday and give you a lift? Or shall we just meet you there."

We planned everything out for ten more minutes - Jacob would come to pick me up after school on Friday and we would all go down to the beach. Afterwards, as I was in no rush to feed Larry now because he was happily eating all the potato chips we had, Jake and I just talked about school and friends and caught up. He asked me about the prom and I told him, leaving out the dancing part and the dare to speak to Carlisle. Then I asked him what he had been doing this part month.

"You've been making a car?" I gasped. I knew Jacob was good with motorbikes and cars, but I didn't expect him to do something so advanced.

There was pride in his voice when he replied. "Yep. Well, it was already made, but it wouldn't start. It was broken, a waste, so the owners let me have it for free. I'm now getting it new parts. Once it works, I'll be able to get a new car."

"What kind of car is it?" I wasn't good at cars, and knew that whatever he said would sound strange to me, but it was nice to speak to him. And I knew he was dying for me to ask.

"A Volkswagen Rabbit," He replied. Yep, sounded strange to be. "I just got it started, so I'll be taking the Chevy to pick you up. Will that be OK?"

"Better than my invisible car. It's a classic." I joked and he laughed his rumbling laugh.

"When are you going to get a car, Esme?" He asked.

"I have my drivers license, just not a car."

Jake was silent for a moment. "Do you want to have the Chevy when I'm done with the Rabbit? I won't need it after the Rabbit is done."

"Wow, thanks Jake, I owe you one."

"Just think of it as pay back for all the pizza and drinks you have bought us, and how many dinners you have cooked for Billy and I. I'd rather it went to you than some stranger."

"I don't have to pay you?" I was a little surprised.

"Nope, just promise not to ruin it the second you get it." He said teasingly.

"You know I can't make that promise." I said and he laughed. "Seriously, thanks Jake."

"Not mention it, its the least I can do. Oh, I got to go now Esme, see you Friday."

"Yep, see ya! Bye!" And then he hung up.


	7. Black as Night

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

I had made no further success in finding a date for Monday, so it looked like Mike Newton would be the only option. Oh well, it was just for one night. And fifty dollars was a good prize for inviting Mike Newton.

The others were pleased and excited for the beach. It was Friday and I was on my way to the canteen. A hand grabbed my arm and I winced at the cold touch, jumping out of my skin.

"Sorry," Carlisle let go of my hand. "Mind if I walk to lunch with you today?"

I searched for that word I was looking for. How did you say it? "S-sure."

He moved to my side and we started walking down the corridor towards the canteen. I didn't like the look people gave Carlisle and I heard someone whisper to their friend, 'Why is Esme walking with Cullen?' and I glared at them when I passed. No surprise who had been the one to say that. Tyler looked back at me with narrowed, questioning eyes.

I didn't know if Carlisle had heard them, or if he had chosen to ignore them. If he had, he was very controlled and calm about it.

"Do you have any plans for the weekend?" He asked me.

I nodded. "We're all going to the beach after school, you're welcome to join us, if you want to." I invited.

"Which beach?"

Well, it wasn't a no, yet. "La Push,"

His eyes, black as they had been the other day, darkened even more - if that was possible. "La Push?"

"Yeah, it's really good this time of year for surfing and the rock pool are filled with crabs and starfish and..." I trailed off when I saw he was shaking his head.

"As much as I appreciate the offer, I'll have to say no."

"Why?" I asked, a little offended.

"Because," He shrugged.

I gave a little growl. "You know, people might start to like you better if you tried to be nice to them as well!"

His eyes flashed. "That's not what I meant! I'm busy this weekend, so I can't make it. We're going camping, the weathers meant to be good."

I swallowed, embarrassed. "Sorry,"

"It's OK. Would you like a ride down the beach?"

I smiled. "Thanks, but no thanks."

"Your boyfriend giving you a lift?" He asked.

"No, my best friend is."

His eyes widened. "I'm surprised they let that hyper little pixie drive."

"Not Alice!" I said, not able to hide my amusement. 'Hyper little pixie' really did describe Alice. "She's my best girl friend, but Jake is my overall best friend."

"Jake who? Does he go to this school?" Carlisle pressed.

I shook my head. "No, he goes to school on the reservation. His name is Jacob Black."

I noticed that Carlisle's jaw locked and his eyes blazed at the name.

Curiosity spread through me. "Do you know Jacob?"

"I guess you can say that. We don't get along." Carlisle's voice sounded like a growl.

"Why?"

He ran a hand through his ruffled blonde hair. "Don't worry about it. We're at the canteen now."

I glared at him as he walked to the door and opened it for me. I continued glaring at him as I slipped past. "Thanks."

"You really need to work on your glaring." He said with an amused chuckle. "Your friends are waiting."

"You going to have lunch with your family today?" I asked a little sharply.

He nodded. "I need to speak with Michael about camping this weekend. I'll see you next lesson."

"Your in my next lesson?"

"Mr Fredrickson for science, right?"

I nodded. "Yeah, I was expecting you to ditch."

His laugh was smooth, like a purring sound. "We don't ditch every day you know, just once and a while. I think that was your mistake, ditching frequently. Mr Greene was bound to get suspicious."

"You haven't been caught yet?"

"Na, he doesn't even suspect us." He looked over at the table where his family were sat. "Want me to walk you to the canteen line?"

"I think I can manage walking there by myself." I said.

He smiled. "Without tripping over?"

"There is nothing to trip over, it's a smooth floor." I retorted.

"So?"

I glowered at him. "I'm not eating today."

"That's unhealthy, you need to eat." He said.

"Like you follow that rule." I turned on my heels and walked over to my friends. I looked over my shoulder at him. "I'll see you next lesson, Carlisle."

"Yeah," He said and headed towards his own table. Olivia's eyes had that same angry look that traveled from her brother, to me, then back again. I shuddered and sat in the spare seat on the table.

For the first time I realized there were more people on our table than normal. Mike, Angela Weber Jessica, Lauren and Katie Marshall were all sat on our table along with Tyler and Austin.

None of them commented on Carlisle speaking with me again, although I knew that was what Rosalie and Alice and Bella would ask me about later on in science, the one lesson were we all sat together on the same table. And no one mentioned the trip to the beach. Even though they put up with Mike Newton for Bella's sake, they didn't want him to come along with us. Angela was OK, she seemed nice and friendly and talked to Alice all the way through lunch, but Lauren wasn't that fun to be around, and Jessica seemed to do whatever Lauren did. Pathetic.

I looked back over at the table where the Cullen's were sat and shivered at what I saw.

All their eyes were black as night.


	8. We Cannot be Friends

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

In science we were asked to create salt by ourselves without any instructions or clues from the teacher. When Mr Fredrickson when next door to get more equipment for a group who had ruined theirs, Rose and I stuck to his desk and looked at the sheet of instructions he had left there.

"You know that's cheating." A familiar voice that made me shiver in both pleasure and worry, spoke from behind me. Carlisle was stood there leaning against the whiteboard, his arms crossed across his chest and a grin on his face.

I raised my eyebrows at him. Rosalie saw and went off to tell Bella and Alice the answers, giving me wink before she left. I sighed.

"But you know what isn't cheating? Asking for help." He continued, standing up and walking over to me.

"And what would you have said if I had asked you?" The though time I was speaking I was gazing up at his black eyes. What had happened to the golden gaze I had been envious of? Had they been the contacts? Was black his real eye colour? If it was, then it was strange how Olivia and the others had the same on. Apparently the Cullen's had been adopted by Dr and Mrs Cullen, or was that just a lie? But then again, why would they lie about who their parents were? This was so confusing! And annoying.

He smiled that breath-taking smile. "I would have said yes."

I blushed. "Well, we have the answers now."

"Can you remember the instructions? Tell them to me. Without looking at the paper." He challenged, grabbing the paper before I could.

"No,

"Why not?"

"Because I don't want to." I didn't want to be proved wrong by anyone, not even him. I hated the fact that I wasn't that clever.

"That's not a reason."

I groaned. "You're so annoying!"

"And your so stubborn!" He shot back.

"Stubborn is good, it means I don't let people tell me what to do."

"Annoying can be good sometimes, it makes people go away easier."

Stop having comebacks! I turned away from him back he grabbed my arm, spinning me back around to face him before I could take one step away from him.

He sighed. "I'm sorry. Sometimes I get like that."

"I thought it was only girls who got moody one time of the month." I said.

He laughed. "Boys can get moody to, although we don't admit it, and not for the same reason."

I glanced at the door. Teacher was taking forever!

"Well, I'm going to go sit down now." I told him.

"Do you not need my help?" He asked, taking a step forward so we were standing really close to each other. I felt his breath on my skin, I looked into those black eyes and I felt lost. Now, I felt scared, hunted. It was like I was prey looking into the eyes of the hunter. I quickly took a step backward.

I shook my head. "I'm good thanks."

"I have one question before you leave."

I sighed. "Fine, but just one."

"I thought we were friends yesterday. Well, not friends, maybe a little less than that, but at least we talked as if we were friends. Now we can't stop snapping at each other."

"So you want to be friends with me?" I said in disbelief.

He shook his head and I narrowed my eyes.

"I think it would be safer for you if we weren't." He said in a tense voice. "I've been trying to stay away from you, but it's been proved...harder than I first thought."

"Is that why you don't sit with us at lunch anymore?"

He nodded. "Yes. I wanted to let you know softly, that was my way of telling you that we cannot longer talk. But the other day, when you were walking to the canteen, it was so hard just to walk right past you. I had to talk to you."

I swallowed.

"Don't take this the wrong way. Your a nice girl, and your really pretty, the most beautiful girl I have ever seen, even Olivia. But this is for your safety, Esme."

"My safety!" I had to stop from shouting as I was aware that a few pairs of eyes were on us, especially from my table. "What the hell are you talking about?!"

"Please just...trust me."

"Trust you? I don't even know you!"

"Yet you thought you knew me well enough to invite me to have lunch with you and ask me if I wanted to join you at the beach."

I looked away from his dark eyes. "I was being polite."

"So you don't care that I couldn't make it? I could see the hurt in your eyes Esme. It killed me to know that I had been so rude to say no to something so kind and generous, but I had to do it."

"Why? Why now do you tell me cannot be friends? Why not at the beginning?" I knew Olivia played some part in this. I didn't know why, I just knew.

He looked as if he was in pain. Huh. "I thought it would be easy to be around you back then. It was foolish of me. I made you think we were friends and now I do this. But I have to, for your-"

"-for my safety," I finished for him. "Yes, I know, as you said before about ten times!"

"Look, Esme. This is really hard for me, because I wanted to be your friend. I can be myself around you, all my worries and stress go away, but it's just not safe for you if I hang around with you anymore."

I stared up at him, confused and upset.

"Well, then I am the one who should be sorry, Carlisle." I was no way going to let him be the one to say that. I was going to end this conversation, not him. "For I made myself believe that you were my friend. I'll see you around."

"Esme-" He started, but I was already turning back to the table.

Mr Fredrickson walked into the room at that moment. "In your seat please, Mr Cullen."

"Yes, sir." Carlisle said in a tired voice and I knew he was watching me because I could feel his eyes burning into my back and it took all of my strength to keep my head forward and not look at him.

"There you are!" Alice greeted me as she placed a little bowl on top of the burner. "We've almost done!"

"Sorry, I was talking to someone." I said, sitting down beside Rosalie, because then my back was on him.

"Are you OK, Esme?" Bella asked, worried. "You look awful!"

"Thanks," I said, resting my head on my arms which were folded on the table. "And I'm fine. Can we talk about something other than me? We are going to the beach later."

They started chatting about La Push, but I knew they were only doing it for my benefit, and Bella kept glancing anxiously from me to Carlisle and then back to me.

I closed my eyes.


	9. Old Stories

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

Jacob stood at the front of the parking lot, tall and russet-skinned. Instantly I saw some changes about him. "Your hair!" I cried as I ran up to him and hugged him. Pulling back I noticed that it was cropped short now, no longer long and worn in a ponytail.

"Got it cut," Jacob reported proudly. "Thought it was more manly."

"I liked it before," I muttered, trying to remember what it had looked like. "I thought it suited you."

"You know you basically just said I looked like a girl." He joked.

"Where are the others?" I couldn't see Sam and the gang.

"Down at the beach." He told me. "They wanted to get the best spot before your schoolmates head down."

I nodded. "Should have guessed,"

"Ready to go?" He asked, gesturing his head to where his red Chevy truck was parked.

"Sure, lets go." I was eager to get out of _his _gaze. "How long is the beach again? I haven't been there in so long!"

"Thirty minutes, gives us plenty of time to catch up." Jacob said brightly as we started walking towards the red truck.

Then I saw them walking towards their car, a shiny black Volvo and a flashy blue convertable. A growl rippled in Jacob's throat and I myself felt cold towards one of them in particular. The crowd surrounding their two cars parted as they approached. Olivia and Jack at the front, then Sophia and Michael, and then _him. _They climbed into their cars without looking at me once.

"The Cullen's," Jacob spat the name in disgust and for once I didn't scold. "Are you friends with them?"

I shook my head. "No," I was speaking through clenched teeth.

"Are they annoying you?" His eyes flashed with worry.

"No, not all of them."

"Which one is the joker then?" He gave another growl. It wasn't like Jacob to be so aggressive, but I guess it was because it was someone bugging me that we were talking about. Jacob was like a big brother, really protective of me, like Emmett was of all of us.

"The blonde one," I tugged on his arm. "Come on, we have to go!"

"If it gets any worse, tell me."

"He isn't bullying me. We just don't get along, like the two of you don't."

He stiffened. "You know about that?"

"He told me, when he was still speaking to me."

"What happened?"

"I'll tell you in the car. Come on!"

He finally allowed me to drag him towards the car and we both climbed in. It wasn't fair how Jacob was one year younger than me and already had a car of his own! But soon I would have a car, this car.

The Chevy wasn't so bad. I liked it, just because it was old didn't mean it wasn't a good car. It was very strong-looking, which was good for me, and it was a classic, something I had always wanted. My father had said that when I was seventeen he would get me a classic model. He just never got to...

No, don't think about that Esme.

"So, tell me everything." Jacob ordered as we drove out of school and pulled onto the freeway towards the beach. I remembered the route now. Yep, thirty minutes would give us plenty of time to catch up, possibly.

"Well, at the prom I got dared to speak to Carlisle, the youngest of the Cullen's with the blonde hair but you already know that," I was babbling, I knew that but I couldn't stop. "We spoke twice after that, he was in the line with me in the canteen but he didn't buy or eat anything, and then on the way to the canteen the next day. But then in science just now he told me that we shouldn't be friends. Something about my safety or whatever."

Jacob was nodding, which confused me. "I think you should listen to him."

"Why?" I demanded.

He sighed. "My dad has this theory on the Cullen's. Carlisle was right when he said it was best for your safety that you weren't around him."

"Jacob, what are you talking about?"

"It's nothing really, just Billy being superposition. Forget I said anything."

If he wasn't driving, I would have yanked his arm again. "Jake, tell me!"

"It's nothing!"

"Then why aren't you telling me?"

He sighed. "Fine, but only because your my best friend and this is starting to get on my nerves. I should tell you that this is a long story."

I looked at the time on my mobile. "We have twenty-six minutes, plenty of time!"

"Alright, but no questions till the end."

"Deal."

He gave another exasperated sigh. "Right, how to begin..?"

"Oh just spit it out, Jake!" I was dying to hear what he had to say about the Cullens.

He smirked at me. "Don't rush me, I can't exactly remember what Billy said."

"Twenty-five minutes." I knew he was teasing me, trying not to tell me what he knew and was delaying it.

"Fine." He said, giving in at last. "Do you know any of our old stories, about where we came from - the Quileutes I mean?"

I bit my lower lip. Billy and Jacob had mentioned something about the Quileute's before, but I couldn't remember. I shook my head.

"Didn't think so, you were seven when Billy told you. Well, there are lots of legends, some of them claiming to date back to the Flood - supposedly, the ancient Quilleutes tied their canoes to the tops of the tallest trees on the mountain to survive like Noah and the ark. Another legend claims that we decended from wolves - that the wolves are our brothers still. It's against tribal law to kill them."

Wolves? I had seen pictures of wolves and my dad had always watched documentaries on TV. They were pack animals, living with others as a way of suriviving the harsh winters out in the wild and hunting as one. I had always admired the way they could communicate to each other and how they ranked themselves in the pack, the Alpha pair and so on. But I wouldn't like to go anywhere near a wolf's teeth though.

I didn't say anything out loud though, although a few questions were already gathering at the tip of my tongue. He continued.

"Then there are stories about the _cold ones.__"_

This was the one thing he wanted me to ask, he was waiting for my question. "The cold ones?" I said.

He nodded. "Yes. There are stories of the cold ones as old as the wolf legends, and some much more recent. According to the legend, my great-grandfather knew some of them. He was the one who made the treaty that kept them off our land." I didn't miss the roll of his eyes.

"Your grat-grandfather?" I had forgotten about the whole no-questions-till-the-end thing, and I could tell he was allowing my questions. I had never known about Jacob's family, only his father Billy and his two sisters, Rebecca and Rachel, and his mother.

"He was a tribe elder, like my father. You see, the cold ones are the natural enemies of the wolf - well, not the wolf really, but the wolves that could turn into men, like our ancestors. You would call them werewolves."

Werewolves? Those big men who every time there was a full moon would turn into a hairy beast? But I knew that wasn;t the case this time. Hollywood's verison had clouded my mind so every time I heard the word, or read it, I would think of the whole full-moon thing.

"Werewolves have enemies?" I managed to ask, trying to think of what these werewolves would look like.

"Only one," He said in a dark voice that didn't sound like Jake at all. Did he believe this as well? "You see, the cold ones are traditionally our enemies. But this pack that came into our territory during my great-grandfathers time was different. They didn't hunt the way the others of their kind did - they weren't supposed to be dangerous to the tribe. So my great-grandfather made a truce with them. If they promised to stay off our land, we wouldn't reveal them to the pale-faces."

"But if they weren't dangerous, then why...?" I couldn't finish my sentence. I wasn't following. This was all new information and I was wondering how it was linked to the Cullen's at all.

"There is always a risk for humans to be around the cold ones, even if they are civilized like this clan was. You never know when they might get too hungry to resist."

"And what exactly do you mean by 'civilized'?"

"They claimed that they didn't hunt humans. They supposedly feed of animals instead." Jacob said.

Now I had to ask. "How does this fit in with the Cullen's though? Are they like the cold ones your great-grandfather meant?"

He shook his head. "No," His grip around the steering wheel tightened until I could see the white over his knuckles and he looked ready to snap the wheel into two. "They are the _same_ ones."

"They have grown since we last saw them - they have a new female and a new male in their clan, but the rest are the same. In my great-grandfather's time they already knew of the leader, William. He'd been there and gone before your people had even arrived."

I didn;t understand Jacob sometimes. Here he was telling me all these stories about cold ones and vampires, yet he looked ready to smile as if he was telling a scary story to a little kid.

"And what are they, the cold ones?" I pressed, desperate to find out where this was going. I knew what my question actually meant.

What were the Cullen's?

His voice was ice cold as he replied, "Blood drinkers, your people might call them vampires."

I froze in my seat, my eyes widening. Impossible.

"But if they were vampires, wouldn't the whole school be dead by now?" I asked. It was scary to think that those five beautiful humans who didn't eat and never spoke to anyone, were vampires. Suddenly Carlisle's words were starting to make sense. For your own safety, we shouldn't hang out.

"Like I said, they were different from the rest of their kind. They somehow manage to survive on the blood of animals. If they were blood drinkers, werewolves would have killed them. The rules say that if any of them bite a human, even kill a human, then the treaty is over and the werewolves are allowed to kill the vampires."

I shivered at the mention of the name.

Vampire.


	10. The first time I saw them

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

I was still shivering by the time they had lit the fire. It was seven at night and the girls were roasting marshmallows over the flames while the guys continued their game of football on the sand, Jacob among them. I wanted to talk to him, find out more about the vampires, but part of me didn't want to. How could the Cullen's be vampires? It was crazy!

I had thought something was different about them the second they had walked into school on that first day of the year. Just the way they moved was enough to raise suspicion. Not even a professional ballet dancer could move so gracefully, so smoothly.

I remembered that day like it had happened yesterday.

_"Esme, we're going shopping tonight, wanna come?" Rosalie asked me as I walked over to her, Bella and Alice, who were talking by Emmett's large Jeep with the boys a few feet away. _

_"We want to make sure we have new clothes for this year," Alice added._

_I nodded. "Sure, I'm free. Are we going after school?"_

_They all dipped their head. "Yep," Bella said, smiling. "I've got some money saved for shopping."_

_"It's going to be so much fun!" Alice sang, already excited. "I can't remember the last time the four of us hung out, just the girls."_

_"Me neither." Bella and Rosalie agreed._

_Then Alice's eyes widened. "Look!" She hissed and we all turned to see what she was looking at._

_Two expensive-looking cars, so out of place here among the tacky trucks and rusty-covered cars ruined by the among of rain that had fallen in the past few months, were parked at the side of the parking lot. A girl stepped out of the blue convertible, wearing sunglasses even though the sun wasn't shining. She was wearing a pair of red skinny jeans tat clung to her thin legs and a white blouse. Her hair was a beautiful shade of mahogany. She was joined by a boy with a muscular build, his black t-shirt showing all the muscles of his chest and his bulky arms were flexed. He wrapped an arm around her waist.  
_

_The second girl was just skin and bone, even skinner than her sister. Her auburn hair was tied back in a pony tail and went down to her waist. She didn't wear sunglasses like her sister and her eyes were wide as she looked around at the car park. A boy with curly short brown hair joined her and put an arm around her shoulder and kissed the top of her head._

_And then they were joined by him. He was wearing black trousers and a white vest top that, like the muscular bear-sized boy, showed off every muscle and line of his chest and stomach. He ran a hand through his blonde hair, the musclues on his arms flexing as he did so. He didn't look nearly as strong as his brother, but had that fighter look about him. _

_Tehn they locked their cars and walked towards the school. Their pace was slower than a human's, but they looked so elegant and graceful no one really noticed. _

_"No, they can't be the Cullen's," Alice said with a small shake of her head._

_"The who?" We all asked, even the boys._

_"The Cullen's. I heard from Angela that a family were moving into town and were all starting today. The children are adopted and there are five of them. But that can't be them, there are two couples!"_

_We all agreed that it wasn't the Cullen's until Bella and I found out in art class. The girl with the mohogany hair was there, sat at the back next to her blonde-haired brother. I couldn't help glance at them. They sat so still, like statues, not moving an inch. They eyes were golden, matching._

_"Olivia Cullen?" The teacher called from the front of the class, making me turn to look around the class for the first of the Cullen's._

_But the voice came from behind me, from the girl next to her movie-star good-looks brother. "Here, sir."_

_"And Carlisle Cullen?" The teacher turned to the boy next to her, who nodded._

_"Here, sir."_

_They voices were so beautiful, so musical. _

_That was the first time I had seen them, the mysterious Cullen family._

Of course when I had first seen them I had no idea that they would be blood-sucking vampires. It just wasn't right.

There were some nonhuman facts about them though. I remembered Carlisle's cold skin when he touched my arm the other day, how it had sent shivers down my spine as if he had put it in a freezer for hours. Then I remembered his eyes, how they had changed from golden to black, but that might have been contacts...and his voice, it had sounded like a harmony.

_"For your own safety, we cannot be friends."_

He had been trying to warn me. But why? Surely if he was a vampire, he'd rather drink my blood than stop being friends with me. But then again, Jacob had told me that they were different, that they survived on the blood of animals.

_"There is always a risk for humans to be around the cold ones, even civilized ones like this clan. You never know when their hunger becomes too strong for them to resist."_

Jacob's words made me shiver again, not from the cold wind but from the coldness in his voice as he described his ancients enemies. Their hunger. Their thirst for blood. Could it be that even vampires who chose to feed of animals could, or have been, tempted to drink human blood as well?

Carlisle had been trying to protect me from him. But he wasn't trying to protect the rest of the school, just me. Why was that?

I lifted my legs up, tucked them closer to my chest and wrapped my arms around them, fixing my arms to the fires as the embers cracked and the bright light stun my eyes.


	11. Research

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

I didn't care about the date on Monday. I could survive one night with Mike Newton, right? I had more important things to do now.

As soon as I got home I went up to my room and turned on the computer. The neighbor had left me a note saying that she had already given Larry his food and I could hear my brother snoring in his sleep from his bed. I wished I could be that relaxed, that I could sleep. But if I feel asleep I would think about what I had learnt today.

I typed in vampires in the search box and, after breathing in and out soothingly for a few minutes, pressed 'go' and waited for the results. There were a lot of them.

I searched the different meanings of vampires on all the websites I can find, and some of them were not nice. The most common meanings were _immortal _and _blood drinker _and a few times _soulless _was mentioned. I shook my head half-way through as all this information was getting stored there. I wasn't used to all this thinking, so I went downstiars and made myself a sandwich and got a drink.

When I got back I looked at the different vampires of the world, their names from different countries. Although the names were different, the definitions were all the same.

The images were horrible. They all showed a man bending over a woman and sinking its sharp fangs into her neck. The fangs, so sharp and deadly. I would have noticed if Carlisle had fangs when he had smiled at me, right? But not all the myths were true, that's why they were called 'myths' because you can't know if they are true or not.

There was a story of a vampire who worked for humans. When a woman cut her finger the vampire cleaned her wound for her, but the blood became too tempting for it to resist and it continued sucking, draining her body of blood and killing her. I shuddered and closed down that page, the image of the woman's horrified face entered my mind and I shook my head, trying to get it out again.

I had almost given up hope on ever finding a good vampire, even just one little mentioning of that possibility. Then, just as I was about to close down, I saw something and clicked on it.

Stregoni benefici; An Italian vampire, said to be on the side of goodness, and a mortal enemy of all evil vampires.

That was all I needed to recover my hope. Maybe the Cullen's were good after all, just like Jacob had said. Maybe their animal diet and goodness allowed them to go to school. And I remembered that Carlisle's dad was a doctor. Being around all that blood must take some self-control. A smile formed on my face, I couldn't help it. They were good, they had to be.

But Jacob had also said that this was his father beleiving in old stories. Were they really just stories?

I fetched a notebook from my desk and tore out a piece of paper, writing down the things I already knew about vampires, or what I had heard from Jacob earlier.

_Beautiful_

_Cold-skinned_

_Very strong_

_Powerful_

_Immortal _

_Blood-suckers_

I gave a laugh as I felt tempted to write about the garlic thing, but then again I had never really believed that, evn when I was a little girl I had thought it was fake. Why would something so powerful and strong be scared of a little white pulp?

I flopped down on the bed, exhausted. I would have to confront Carlisle about this, get the real answer.

I started planning what I would say to him and in which order they would go in, already knowing I would be too chicken to actually follow-through with my plan.

_Hey, Carlisle. Look I know you said that we cannot be friends, but I just wanted to ask you one question. You see, a friend of mine knows of some stories that are linked to you and your family, and they've kind of stuck in my head for a while. I was just wondering if you were a vampire, that's all._

That was my genius plan? That was what I was going to say? No! That was stupid. Carlisle would never tell the the answer, not just because we would be in the school, but because if he was a vampire he wouldn't be likely to tell me, was he? But part of me was sure he was, I just needed to hear him admit it out loud.

I would have to corner him, get him alone, and force him to tell me the truth. I knew it would be hard, but I wouldn't leave him alone, never stop trying, until he gave me an answer, a truthful one.

It was just a case of waiting for the rest opportunity like a hunter waiting, ready to spring, in the shadows waiting for its prey to become easier to catch. Or should I just pounce straight away and kept doing that until he got too weak or annoyed to put up with me any longer and just gave up, like a deer finally collapsing in defeat under the claws of the hunter.

I realized what I was doing. I was calling myself the hunter and Carlisle the prey, but if my accusation on him being a vampire was true, it would be the other way around.

I remembered suddenly what I had thought when I was looking into his black eyes.

They were really the eyes of the hunter.


	12. My Date

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

I wasn't tired when I woke up Monday morning after a whole weekend of staring a computer screen and reading about vampires, my dreams filled with the images of blood and sharp fangs. In fact I was anything but. I was eager to get to school but anxious of having to try to talk to Carlisle again, knowing he would be hanging around with his family as normal.

When my alarm clock went off I practically sprang to my feet and, grabbing my towel off the radiator, flew myself across the hall into the bathroom, locking the door behind me and ran the shower. It was hot so the water stun on my back, but if I turned it to cold it would remind me of Carlisle's icy skin. I climbed out and got dressed, running a brush through my caramel hair then picking up my make-up bag.

I was putting on my make-up when there was a knock on the door. "Give me one minute, please!"

"Sorry," An amused voice came from outside.

"Edward!" I gasped, almost dropping the lipstick that was in my hand. "Your early!"

"No, your late." He said, still laughing. I knew he was smiling. "Seriously, what's taking you so long?"

"I'm almost done," I called.

He chuckled. "Translation; I'm putting on my make-up so you can just wait."

I finished and cleaned up the bathroom before unlocking the door and walking out. Edward was leaning against the wall and laughed. "Finally!"

"I woke up late." I lied.

"Never play poker, Esme. Your an awful liar!" He pointed at my alarm clock, which was still set on the time I had woken up on.

I sighed. "Didn't hear it, so I overslept."

"Seriously, never play poker." He said.

I walked into my room and got my stuff, checking my phone. There was a text from Rosalie, but I would read it in the car.

"Bite me," Edward suddenly said.

"What?!" I demanded, spinning around, then sighed with relief.

He was looking at the book I had left on my bed, reading the blurb. "Seriously, a vampire book?" He asked, shaking his head. "I'll never understand you Esme. I thought you hated blood."

"There was nothing else to read. Besides, it's interesting." I snatched the book from him and flung it back on the bed. "Can we go to school now?"

He nodded. "I'm not the one who made us late."

"Oh shut-up!"

We headed downstairs, and I noticed that Larry was gone.

"Neighbor took him into school for you." He told me when he saw the look of panic on my face. "She said that you didn't get home till late last night."

"I was round Jake's. And I got a date for tonight, so it looks like you owe me ten dollars. I'll be collecting my money at lunch from you and the others."

"Who is your date?"

"Jacob. He offered when I told him I might have to ask Mike Newton out." It was true, I had been so busy that weekend that my search for a date had gone nowhere, so while I was round Jacob's I told him and he happily offered to help me out. "I said I would give him ten bucks for doing it, and he agreed."

"You invited your best friend on a date?"

"Not really, it's not going to be a date. They said I had to bring someone, and I did. And there was no rules against asking my best friend." I had made sure before I agreed to it.

Edward snoffed. "I have to say, I'm impressed."

"Impressed that I used my brain for once?"

"Yeah,"

I gave him a gentle shove before opening the door to the living room. Yep, there my mom was, sprayed out across the couch. I quickly fetched a bucket from the kitchen and placed it by the couch, just in case. I knew she had been drinking, this was my mom we were talking about.

Then Edward and I crossed the lawn towards his car, the rain spitting in our faces and I was thankful when I climbed inside the warm car.

On the way to school, Edward asked me why I was looking so forward to it.

I had to come up with a lie, and quick. "I could do with fifty dollars, no forty actually."

He laughed. "Emmett won't be pleased, he was counting on keeping his ten bucks."

"It's good to hear that he has so much faith in me finding a date."

"Well you haven't dated in a while, and I wouldn't say tonight would be a date, you did ask your best friend."

"You know you jut made me sound like a loser." But it was true, I hadn't been on a date for a while. I was sick of the heart-break - sure I was the one normally doing the heart breaking, but still. "And I'm waiting for the right guy to come along."

"Isn;t that what thirty year olds say?" He asked.

I shrugged.

School passed by slowly, which was good for me because it gave me even more time to prepare myself for what I would say to Carlisle. He was in my English, so I would walk up to him when the bell rang and...

Then the bell for lunch rang, cutting off my thoughts. It was action time.

But Carlisle had risen from his seat fluidly and was out of the room before I could even put my pencil in my pocket. Great.

I was aware that I was speed-walking down the corridor, but I didn't care and no one really noticed, they were all too busy trying to get to their friends or heading to the canteen.

Carlisle was walking at his normal slow but graceful pace and I managed to catch up with him, cutting in front of him to block his path. His eyes were golden today.

"Hey," I said.

He looked down at me. "I told you were can't be friends."

This wasn't going well, and it was only ten seconds into the conversation! "Just because we're not friends, doesn't mean its against the law for me to say hey to you, you know."

He made a growling sound. It was so different from Jacob's, more like a predator. I stopped myself from shivering at that.

"Esme, stop making this harder than it already is."

"It doesn't have to be hard. Your just making it difficult." I folded my arms across my chest. "And a 'hey' would be appreciated."

"If I said 'hey' could I go?"

"No, I have some questions for you to answer."

"No," His jaw locked.

I glared at him. "Why not? You don't even know what the questions will be!"

"I don't want to know. Esme, I don't want to talk to you right now."

"Then why are you still here?"

"You're in my way!"

"Ever heard of going around someone?" But if he did, I would quickly step to block his path again.

Then his eyes changed from that topaz colour to the same shade of black as a raven's feather. I gasped.

"Esme," He warned. "Just don't talk to me, OK? Trust me, you don't want to."

"I do though," I said, my fear of his eyes, so hunter like and dark, was vanishing slowly. "Please, Carlisle, tell me why we can't be friends."

He brought his head down so he was whispering close to my ear. "Move, now."

"No," I said stubbornly.

Another growl rippled through his teeth. "Please," He begged. "I don't want to hurt you."

"You won't." I said bravely. "I know you won't." I paused for a second, debating, then added, "Your a good guy."

Then he smirked, but it was cold, like his eyes. "What if I'm not the good guy? What if I'm a bad guy?" He spoke in a low voice, like a growl but much darker.

I was pleased that I didn't shiver or take a step back. "Carlisle..."

"Goodbye, Esme." Then he walked right past me and walked into the canteen, the door swinging shut behind him.


	13. The Bear

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

I wasn't listening to what my friends and Jake were saying at the resteraunt Monday night, I was too busy thinking about what Carlisle had said.

I'm not the good guy, I'm the bad guy.

What the hell did that mean? I thought Jake had said that the Cullen's were different from other...others of their kind. But Carlisle had said he wasn't good, that he was bad. Was he different from his family? Did he, while they feed off the blood of animals, he fed off humans? And what was with the eye changing color thing?

"Tonight was fun," Jake said happily as we walked to his Chevy. He was giving me a lift home. "Emmett's so funny!"

"Yeah, Emmett's great." I agreed, but I had frozen where I stood.

A black Volvo was parked by the forest opposite the hotel. No one was inside it, but I felt as if I was being watched. Then three shapes appeared from the shadows.

One was Olivia, her eyes golden and glowing. Jack had one arm her shoulder as they headed for the car. Carlisle hovered by the drivers door, looking across the road, looking straight at me. Then his gaze flickered to Jake, who was happily chattering away with a huge grin on his face, his body close to mine. Then Jake looked up and followed my gaze.

I saw Jake's lips curl over his teeth in a snarl. The snarl was answered by a growl from Carlisle. I remembered Carlisle had said that he and Jake didn't get along.

Then I noticed Jacob's whole body was quivering.

"Jake," I touched his arm then snatched my hand back. His skin was boiling!

Then Carlisle's eyes turned to me, deep and filled with some kind of emotion. I watched as he opened the door of the car and ducked inside. The Volvo purred and drove down the lane so fast that I almost missed it. It blended in with the shadows so well, and the speed didn't help.

"Are you OK? Your really warm." I said.

Huh, Carlisle's skin is like ice, Jacob's is like fire.

Jacob cleared his throat and dragged his eyes from where the car had disappeared back to me. They softened instantly. "Yeah. Ready to go? Your mum will be wondering where you are!"

"No, more like I'll be wondering where she is."

Edward was late to pick me up for school on Tuesday, for the first time in three years, so I decided to make myself some toast. I was spreading the peanut butter over the jam when a car horn went off from outside. Putting the toast between my teeth, I slipped on my scarf and got my bag before leaving the house, locking the door quickly and rushing for the warmth of the car.

Edward eyed the toast as I put on the seat-belt. "Your actually eating!"

"Don't act all surprised, I had a whole prawn cocktail last night!" I said, taking a bite out of the toast. It warmed my stomach.

"I meant your actually eating breakfast." He gave a little shake of his head as he started up the car. "I guess there's a first time for everything."

He talked about last night and what happened afterwards, something about Emmett getting dared to jump into a pond, but I wasn't paying much attention and he didn't notice.

Edward found parking lot just five places down from the school and we climbed out, the bitter morning hair unwelcome.

I saw _him_ leaning against his Volvo, watching me closely. I felt so small under his eyes. If we weren't friends, why was he looking at me? I bit my lower lip and followed Edward to where the others were.

Rosalie gave me a gentle nudge as I moved to stand next to her. "Cullen's watching you."

"I know," I grumbled.

"Are you OK? You don't seem happy, for one thing you didn't remind me to call him by his real name."

"We aren't friends anymore, why should I?"

Her eyes widened. "What happened?"

"Remember in science when Carlisle and I were talking at the front?" I asked. She nodded once. "That was when it happened. He told me we shouldn't be friends."

"But why?"

I shrugged. "I don't know."

"You should confront him."

"I have. I tried before lunch yesterday."

"Try harder." She encouraged. "Follow him and demand to know why you can't be friends. It's worth a shot."

"I guess."

By lunch I had a plan made up. I saw Carlisle leave his family and saw his brother mouth the words 'see ya' before Carlisle turned and walked out of the door.

"I'm going home I don't feel well. Tell sir, thanks." I said quickly to my friends, gathering my stuff and leaving before anyone could ask where I was going.

I could see a dark figure disappear into the trees when I walked out of the canteen and rushed after it. I was going to talk to him whether he liked it or not.

The shadows of the trees were cool, the branches creaked in the breeze and the leaves rustled. The undergrowth was alive with mice and voles. I didn't know which way he went, but as I looked at the ground I could see the marks from his boots and I followed them deeper into the forest.

I had never been here before, I wasn't a very outdoorsy person and just enjoyed going to the beach because I would try, and fail, to get a tan. But I had never thought of coming out into the forest for a walk. I had had a dog once, but I took it to the park, never wanting to go in the woods. And my father used to come out here sometimes with his friends to fish in the small stream at the edge of the forest to the west.

I wondered why he had picked this place to ditch, and not somewhere fun like the mall or the beach. Then I remembered what he hunted, or was accused of hunting, and then this seemed like the perfect place. It explained what he, Olivia and Jack were doing in the forest so late at night last night.

I came to a beautiful clearing and crossed the flower-covered ground, the grass swinging under my shoes. I was so glad I picked Converses to wear today.

Then I heard a growling sound from behind me when I reached the end of the clearing. I turned around and looked, but no one was there. "Carlisle?" I called hopefully. Maybe searching for him was easier than I had first thought.

But it wasn't Carlisle. The growl had been a territorial growl, a low one rumbling under a thick layer of fur. What had made the noise?

In answer to my question, the bushes on the side of the clearing opposite me parted to reveal a bulky shape of a grizzly. The bear straightened, its shadow stretching half-way across the field. It looked at me with black eyes and its lips curled over its jaws to reveal a set of sharp, deadly teeth A snarl ripped through the air.

"Great," I muttered.

The bear took a step forward, its ears pricked towards me and its eyes focused on me. The whole ground shook because of that one step.

I was defiantly going to die. For the first time ever, I wanted to be in school. There were no grizzlies in school.


	14. I'm a Monster

**I was reading Twilight the other day and wondered what it would be like if Esme was Bella and Carlisle was Edward, like they swapped places. Esme is popular, beautiful and can go out with anyone she wants. Carlisle, along with his vampire family, is new, handsome and unlike anyone Esme has ever met.**

**DISCLAIMER: The characters and the Twilight series belong to Stephenie Meyer**

I swallowed and took a step backwards.

The bear moved forward, then reared back so it stood on its two back legs that were as thick as tree stumps. It swatted the air with its front paws, clamping them together and I heard the ear-splitting sound of the claws as they scratched together and shuddered. Then the bear fell down to four paws again and started to walk over towards me, its broad shoulders swaying in the movement.

I closed my eyes, hoping it would kill me quickly and not play with its food.

Then another growl split the air, a familiar one, and something hard and cold rammed into my side. My eyes flew open and I saw the forest and sky rush past me and then I crashed to the floor. My arm was stinging and I looked up to see who had done that.

Carlisle stood in front of me in a protective crouch. The bear turned to face him and let out an outraged cry, as if angry that Carlisle had moved its food. I realized that bears only attacked humans when they were hungry. This bear hadn't had a successful summer.

"Don't move a muscle," Carlisle ordered, not even looking at me. I tried to stop trembling. "And don't make a sound."

Suddenly Carlisle was launching himself right at the bear. The creature reared back so it towered over him but Carlisle flew at its belly, knocking it backwards. While the bear rolled to its paws Carlisle was already on his feet. The bear swung a huge paw towards him and Carlisle jumped into the air, landing on the bears back. The animal fell on its side, rolling and attempting to crush him, but Carlisle jumped off at the last minute. The bear struggled to its paws, growling and spitting with anger.

Fear and panic were rushing through me as I watched Carlisle in a fight that there was no chance of him winning. I had to hold back a scream.

I saw Carlisle dart to the edge of the clearing, so fast that he was just a blur of black and white, and wrap his hands around a boulder. Without any effort he picked it up and threw it. It landed right in front of the bear - I guess he had aimed it there on purpose, not wanting to actually squish the bear right in front of me.

The bear stumbled backwards, it's eyes wide. Then it turned and raced for the trees. Carlisle watched it leave and then suddenly appeared at my side.

"Show me your arm," He demanded, but before I could do anything, he had lifted my arm for me and was looking at it carefully. "It's just a graze from where you slid across the ground." He decided, placing my arm gently on my lap. Then a look of fury flashed in his eyes and he stood up. "That was a stupid move, coming out here! Didn't you smell the grizzly scent? It's everywhere, it clings to every bush, tree and even the air and you missed it!?"

"I'm a human, I don't have such a good nose." I defended myself.

His eyes stretched even more in shock. "And who says I'm not human?"

"I know you aren't."

"And how are you so sure?"

"A real human can't pick up a boulder and then chuck it several meters! It's not humanly possible!" I pointed out. "And a human doesn't fight with a bear without any weapons!"

He remained to look angry at first, then I thought I heard him sigh.

"Thank you, by the way." I said, breaking the silence that had fallen over us.

He looked at me, startled. "For what?"

"Saving my life." I said, getting up. I lost my balance and was falling to the side when a shoulder was propped under mine and he was helping me. His icy touch still stun a little. "Thanks, again."

"I didn't save your life." He argued. "Instead I risked it even more. Who knew what the bear might have done after that boulder was chucked at it? It might have remembered you and charged."

"But it didn't," I reminded him. "Why did you save me? I thought we weren't friends."

Pain took over the anger in his eyes. "I wasn't - I couldn't - let it kill you."

"But I thought you hated me!"

"I don't hate you. I told you the reason I thought it was better we shouldn't be friends, because of your safety."

"Yet here you are, talking to me like we've been friends all along."

He shrugged. "It was so hard for me to ignore you."

"Are we friends now?"

He shook his head. "No, I wish we were, but we can't."

Then his arm was removed from around me and he was walking away.

"I know what you are," I called after him.

He froze on the spot.

"I worked it out. Well, I had help. But I still know what you are. I know you aren't a danger to me."

Then he looked over his shoulder at me. "What am I then? Say it!"

I swallowed and spoke clearing in a shaking voice, "A vampire."

I wasn't expecting the laughter that followed.

"You know what I am, yet you still want to be friends?" He laughed as if I had made a joke. "Your more crazy than I thought."

"I know you're good, that your different from other vampires. If you weren't, I probably would have left you alone."

"Probably?" He echoed.

I nodded, taking a few steps towards him. "Yeah, probably. Why is it so hard for you to ignore me?" I asked.

He sighed. "Your...different."

"Great, thanks."

"Unique, your unique. I've never met anyone else like you before, Esme. You listen to me and understand me. And you know what I am but you try to be friends. I wanted to ignore you, to not put you in danger, but it was harder than I had expected. I need you."

Those last three words made me freeze. "What?"

"I'm a monster, Esme, yet you make me feel human. That's what a need, a balance. But when we weren't speaking and we weren't friends - of course, that was my fault - it was so unbearable."

He's a vampire. I tried to tell myself that over and over again, thinking I would start to run away, but I didn't. I wasn't leaving him.

I was right behind him now. I placed my hand on his shoulder and he stiffened at the touch. "Your not a monster, Carlisle."

"You don't see it," He turned to face me. "I've killed people before, Esme. The only thing that stops me from repeating history is William."

"Your father, why?"

"He wanted us to be different. When he was changed, he hated who he was. He didn't want to be a murderer, an enemy of humans, so he decided to drink the blood of animals. Humans eat the flesh of animals, so this wasn't that different. He has so much control, that's why he can be a doctor. I envy him that control. He had been working on it for centuries. I know I still have a long way to go before I am that controlled around humans. It's hard at school, so much temptation. Our eyes go black when we are thirsty."

"Your eyes are black a lot at school," I remembered.

"So much temptation," He repeated. "But your blood, it's stronger than the rest. It sings to me. It's really hard not to..."

I knew my hand was on his shoulder still, but I didn't move it away. "I trust you,"

"Your crazy,"

"Maybe, but I still trust you. I know you wouldn't hurt me. If you would, you would have already done it by now. I trust you completely."

He sighed. "Esme, I'm a predator, a monster. Like I've said, I've killed before."

"I'm sure that was ages ago though."

"It was, but I still remember. I looked at their faces when I killed them, I saw myself in their eyes. If I ever hurt you, I would hate myself forever."

"You won't though."

"Do you know what's stopping me from biting you right now?" He asked.

I shook my head. "Because of your control?" I guessed.

"No, because it's you. I need you to stay alive. I need you."

I couldn't find my tongue.

He continued. "I understand if you don't want to be friends."

"You want to be friends now?" It was really hard to catch up with him sometimes.

Carlisle nodded. "It should be easier to control myself around you now, easier that you know the truth. I don't like not speaking to you every day. I want to be your friend."

"You are my friend," I told him.

"Do you have any questions for me? We have an hour before the end of school."

I nodded. "I have one or two questions." More like a ton.

He smiled warmly, the first warm smile I had been given from him for a while. "Let's sit down then, and then we can talk."


	15. Your Beautiful

I sat in the long grass and started plucking at the grass. He was wait with his back pressed against a small tree, waiting me intently, waiting patiently for me to say something. I wanted to say something, but my questions were all tangled in my mind and I was trying to untangle them.

"Penny for your thoughts." Carlisle said, breaking that awkward silence.

I searched for the first question. I had been planning this, yet now it was time to ask, I didn't know what to say. "How long have been a...vampire for?" It was hard to say the word out loud when I was talking about him, to his face. It my head, ti was fine, it was like an alarm going 'vampire, vampire!' all the time.

He smiled. I hadn't realized how much I had smiled that charming smile. After a week of silence between us, it was nice that we could finally be friendly towards each other again.

"A hundred and four," He said.

I stopped my bottom jaw from dropping in shock. "Wow, really?"

He nodded. "I was born in 1902, I was out in the streets when I was attacked by a vampire. He left me in the streets, I was in so much pain I didn't realize he wasn't gone. I maaged to drag myself into the forest, where I hide throughout my transformation. William found me, he wanted to help and I left him Afterwards, i didn't leave him. I stayed with his as his companion, and he soon became like a father to me. I owe him so much. He stopped my from becoming a monster, a murderer. He believed in me and guided me. Anymore questions?"

I bit my lip. "You said earlier on that you have killed before. How many times?"

His eyes flashed, then he sighed. "I guess I should have known you would ask that question. I've killed several people. One night I was out in the forest and I heard what a man was thinking as he stalked a little girl. I had to do something, I couldn't let her die when there was something I could do about it." He started to shake. "I solved it the only way I could, by killing him. In the end he wasn't the murderer, I was."

I got up and moved beside him, putting my hand over his, not even noticing that ice cold skin of his. "Carlisle, you did something good. You saved someone else's live."

"At the cost of a man."

"At the cost of a monster. You aren't the monster." I wanted to change the subject. "You said that you heard the mans thoughts, what did you mean by that?"

He looked at me. "I meant I heard his thoughts, literally. You see, some vampires have gives. When a vampire is transformed, their personalty from their human life comes with them, and their most strongest trait gets doubled. Olivia was beautiful in her human life, so her beauty was only strengthened when she became a vampire. Jack only became stronger. Sophia became more annoying."

The sound of his chuckle made me relax.

"I can hear people's thoughts. When I'm in a room with loads of humans, say in a classroom, its all a bunch of nose until I focus on one human in particular, and their thoughts are so loud and clear that its like they are speaking out loud. But most of the time, in school especially, I just tune it off. It helps me become normal, well look normal anyway. It would make me look weird if I answered a question someone asked themselves inside their head and not out loud, although Jack and Sophia talk to me through their minds sometimes, at school and at home."

I straightened. "OK, what am I thinking about right now?"

"I don't know, I can't hear your thoughts." He said.

I raised my eyebrows. "Are you saying there is something wrong with me?"

"I can hear voices in my head, I'm a vampire, yet you are worried there is something wrong with you because I can't hear your thoughts? Yep, you are crazy sometimes Esme."

To hear him joking and laughing made me smile.

"Your asking me easy questions. Don't you want to hear about something else? You haven't asked about our diet."

"I don't need to, I already know."

"How? And how did you know I was a vampire anyway?"

"I got a little help," I admitted. "Jacob told me about some old legends of his people and I started joining the dots together, putting you and the colds ones together, then researching on the internet."

He dipped his head. "Clever."

"Jacob didn't give you guys away. He didn't believe it, or so I thought so, but there was something at the way the two of you glared at each other last night, like you were ready to kill each other or something...it worried me."

"Why should it worry you?"

"Jacob's my best friend, I care about him. He's like my brother."

Carlisle rolled his eyes at that. "Whatever. You should have heard the things that were running through his mind when he saw us in the forest - leech, bloodsucker, those kind of insults."

"That's not like Jacob, he's normally quite nice."

"Not to us,"

"But that's what I don't get! Your ancestors - well, his anyway - were enemies, not you two. Why should you have to hate each other just because of what happened in the past, before Jacob was even born, before his father was even born?"

"Are you saying all this hatred is my fault for not moving on?" He asked, his voice still velvet-smooth, but I could see I had offended him.

"No, I just don't understand."

He sighed. "Esme, Jacob is part of a tribe. He follows what his ancestors did, he believes in the same things and hates the same things as they did, it's how he's been brought up. I don't mind, it's quite funny."

"Jacob also mentioned that your family lived here many years ago."

"Yes, but then we moved. We move around a lot. Because vampires don't age, it would get the humans suspicious if we didn't get any older, so we move every three or four years."

I tried not to look like that thought upset me. Carlisle would soon leave...no, don't think about that. Your just his friend.

I decided to be the one to talk first, again. "Where you there the first time, when the wolves and your family first met and made that treaty?"

He nodded. "Yes. Olivia and Michael hadn't joined us yet. It was just William, his wife Rebecca, me, Olivia and Jack. We were out hunting when four wolves appeared. They were as big as horses and really aggressive. Through their minds they demanded what we were doing here, and I translated to William who replied to the lead wolf. We communicated that way. I could tell Rebecca wasn't pleased that William and her children were standing so close to these huge wolves, but she allowed William and I to talk to the lead wolf a little further away. Olivia looked ready to sink her teeth into one of the wolves as they growled threateningly at Rebecca when my mother took a step forward. We're all very protective of each other. But when taht was happening William and I were talking to the lead wolf and made the treaty. Olivia and Jack were a little disappointed that they couldn't fight, I could read their minds, and Rebecca was just glad that this didn't end in blood shred."

As he spoke I tried to picture the wolves he was describing, like I had when Jacob had told me about them. They hadn't been wolves, they were werewolves. I had to get used to that. Vampires and werewolves, was everything real?

Then a single ray of sunlight broke through the thick clouds that had covered the sky like a grey blanket. It was followed by more rays, one at a time, and I gasped when I saw what it did to Carlisle. His skin glistened as if a thousand diamonds were embedded in it.

"Your beautiful." I said.

"Seriously, your crazy." He commented, shrugging his jacket over his arms to hide his skin from the sunlight.

"No, you are. It's amazing."

He laughed. Then he stopped. "School's finished."

"How can you tell?" Had it really been one hour?

He lifted his hand and pointed with one finger at his ear. "Super vampire hearing."

"Oh yeah,"

"Do you need a lift home? The others won't mind, they can take Olivia's car home today."

"Edward takes me home." I said.

"He's already left. He thought you went home, remember?"

Of course. I smiled at him. "OK then, you can give me a ride home."

He got up and so did I and together we headed towards the car park.


	16. Family

The purring sound of the Volvo was nice but unfamiliar as Carlisle drove out of school. The seat was comfortable and there wasn't any rubbish like soda cans or crisp packets on the floor. The windows were tinted black so the world outside was darker than normal, but I wasn't focusing on that, I was focusing on Carlisle. He seemed to have calmed down, but he wasn't speaking to me, his eyes were on the road and one hand was on the steering wheel, the other tapping his leg. At the speed he was driving up I was surprised that he didn't have both hands glued to the steering wheel actually, it was a very fast speed, one that had made my belly flip over when it started.

"I can't believe the amount of questions you asked." Carlisle said in disbelief, shaking his head and it looked as if he was smiling. "I mean seriously, I was expecting to be attacked by questions, but you must have asked about five!

Why did he find that funny? "I have lots of questions, I just asked the important ones."

He glanced at me, then turned back to the eyes. "Oh really? Well then, ask me the minor questions, the less important ones then."

"I actually wanted to know more about your family," I admitted. Outside, it had started to rain and I looked at that instead. "What are they like?"

He swallowed. "Um, like your normal, average family really."

"I think you family is anything but normal."

"I didn't mean with the vampire stuff, but if you saw what we were like a home, you wouldn't suspect a thing. William is great and like a dad to all of us, he's always there if we need to ask him anything and he puts us in check whenever we cross over a line, or if we feel tempted to...ruin our records of no human blood, he'll remind us who we really are and what we believe in.

"And Rebecca, she was like a mother to us all the second we met her. She's kind and caring, always looking out for us. She wasn't so comfortable, like I said before, when William and I talked to the wolves. She'd give up her own life to save any of ours, I've always respected her dedication to our family even though we aren't her real children. William and Rebecca have been married for a hundred and twenty years now, but every day they look at each other, love each other like they had only recently gotten married. I hear their thoughts, always worrying if the other is OK. The days when William or one of us are in a mad, upset mood, it kills Rebecca."

"You know the others, well, you know what they are like around school. Jack is pretty much the same at home as he is at school, cocky and competitive, ready for a fight. But he really is like a big brother to all of us. He was saved by Olivia, she saw something about him that she liked and saved him from being mauled by this vicious mountain lion.

"Sophia can be annoying, but we all adore her. She's the one who is always enthusiastic. She can see into the future, you know, not in full visions, in glimpses. She only sees things that will affect our family, but it's still handy to have that gift and mine together. We don't keep her around just because of her gift, she would be part of our family even if she didn't have it.

"Michael was...difficult in the beginning. He is our newest family member, he was changed into a vampire and lived off the blood of humans for a whole two hundred years, so it was very hard for him to go from that to animal blood straight away. Animal blood keeps our first down, but it doesn't keep us as strong as we would be if we were drinking human blood. It's like a human living off tofu, it keeps you fed but you are not fully...satisfied."

I enjoyed listening to him talk about his family. I was seeing a new side of Carlisle, a caring and compassionate one, and I liked that side very much. I didn't say anything, although already in my head there were questions about the members of his family, willing him to go on.

"Olivia is...a very interesting character. You know already that she is beautiful and into her looks, but she isn't vain or shallow. I hate it when people think that of her. She would give up anything, even her beauty, to be human again. She misses it, even though she has Jack now and cares about our family as much as the rest of us do, but she misses humanity. The thing she misses most is possibilities.

Carlisle sighed. "She was heart-broken when she found out vampires couldn't have babies - for a female human, her body changes when she is pregnant to accommodate the baby, vampires bodies cannot change, we are forever frozen in the shape and age we were transformed at. Olivia would give up anything, and I mean anything, to have a baby of her own."

I thought about Olivia. I had been so wrong about her. I thought about her model-perfect face and body, her glossy hair and features. She would really give all that up to be human, like me, to be plain and normal?

Carlisle continued talking. "If there is only thing we all have in common, the strongest part that makes us a real family, it how we would die for one another. I will never be able to repay William for what he gave me, a second chance of live with a family who adored me. As a human, my mother had died giving birth to me and my father wasn't around that much. I didn't have brothers or sisters to talk to, to depend on or to ask for advice. And now I have all that. William gave me so much more than I deserved."

"William and Rebecca sound really nice," I commented.

He nodded. "Nice is an understatement. What are your parents like?"

I swallowed, wishing he hadn't asked, or that he could read by thoughts. My parents were always a difficult thing to talk about. But this was Carlisle, I felt so comfortable with talking to him about anything. Besides, hadn't he just told me vampire secrets and his family?

Taking a deep breath, I started talking. "My mother is...different from the rest of the mums I know. She goes out every night with her friends to bars and nightclubs and would stay there for hours. She drinks a lot whenever she wants to take her mind off things. She comes home every night after midnight and falls asleep on the couch. I don't want Larry, my younger brother, to see her like this. I want him to think of our mother as a fun and caring woman, but she has changed over the past nine years."

"And your dad?" He pressed.

My heart felt like it had been torn out of my chest and thrown at a pavement, shattering into a million pieces at the very mention of my dad. I didn't realize how much I missed him until someone brought it up.

"My dad was great. He would take Larry, Grace and I fishing and camping by this huge lake every few weekends. I loved him so much. But he died nine years ago, in a car crash."

Carlisle put his hand on mine and my cheeks burned with color but he didn't remove his hand. It stayed on mine until we pulled up outside my head.

"Hey, I'm sorry about your dad. I know what its like to loose someone close to you, and I wouldn't wish it on anyone, especially you. You know, if you need someone to talk to, I'm here for you."

He sounded so much like Jake when he said that. Jake! I hadn't spoken to him since Monday night. I should talk to him, ring him.

But I was lost in Carlisle's golden eyes. "Thanks, do you want to come in?"

"Sure, that will be nice." He smiled and we both got out of the car. I led him towards the house, wishing that Larry wouldn't be home to embarrass me.


	17. A little bit of music and history

Please, don't let Larry be home. I begged as I turned the key and unlocked the front door. Of course, I wasn't lucky.

Larry came rushing forward to meet me, but froze when he saw Carlisle. "Is this your new boyfriend, Esme?" He asked.

I wanted to hit my face with my hand, but stopped myself. "No, this is my friend Carlisle."

"Oh," Larry shrugged and went into the kitchen, probably searching for something to eat.

"Sorry about that," I said, blushing a little.

Carlisle chuckled. "Don't worry about it, there's nothing to be sorry about."

"Do you want to go upstairs? There's not much to see up there, but there isn't much to do down here." I offered.

He nodded. "Sure, but shouldn't someone watch your brother?"

"He's old enough and smart enough, I think, to know not to cut himself with knives. He sound be fine." I said, heading towards the staircase with Carlisle right behind me.

When we reached my room, I noticed that he was looking at the pictures of me and my siblings when we were children so decided to rush him down the corridor as quickly as I could much to his amusement, I turned to look at him.

"My room is a bit of a mess," I warned him, twisting the door knob and opening the door.

His beautiful golden eyes looked around my room. The walls were painted blue, the lace curtains yellow, a desk and a bed and a wardrobe took up most of the room, but I had several ranks of CD's stacked in one corner along with my stereo. I noticed that Carlisle was going towards the CD's, something Edward often did when he came round. They must both share a liking in music. I hoped there was more things Carlisle and my friends had in common, it would make hanging out with them both so much easier and make them talk to one another.

"What are you listening to at the moment?" He asked, finger hovering over the Play button. "You have a lot of music."

I swallowed. "Most of it is from Christmas's and Birthdays, but my dad left me his CD'S when he...anyway, and I bought some whenever I had spare money, which is rare - Rosalie likes to go shopping a lot."

Then he pressed play and the familiar music sounded. I knew all the lyrics but stopped myself from mouthing along to the song.

_It was so easy that night_

_Should have been strong, yeah I lied_

_Nobody gets me like you_

_I know everything changes_

_All the cities and faces_

_But I know how I feel about you now_

_Can we bring yesterday back around?_

_Cos I know how I feel about you now_

_I was dumb, I was wrong, I left you down_

_But I know how I feel about you now_

He stopped the music. "The SugaBabes?"

"I think their song," I didn't want to admit how much it related to my feelings. The lyrics matched with what I had with Carlisle. It had been easy to talk to him, it always was, it was easy to be around him and to just laugh and talk to him. And nobody did get me as well as Carlisle did.

"What other music do you have?" He asked, already rummaging through my collection of CD's.

"I can't remember. Alice likes to keep me 'updated with all the latest hits' and I just put them on the rank without really looking at them. Sometimes the things she gives me are so not be, but I can hardly say that to her face, can I?"

He shook his head. "No, that would be rude."

"What type of music do you like?"

"Tracks from the 60's mainly. I like that era, I think it was the best. The 70's are alright, but the 80's I hated. Olivia knows this and uses it against me, she always plays 80's music in the car."

I sat down on the bed and sighed. "Olivia doesn't like me, does she?"

"She's just protective of me. And I'll be the one she hates when she finds out I told you our secret. Our secret is the only thing keeping us alive. If humans found out about vampires, we would all be destroyed. Olivia knows a lot about the rules of our kind, as much as William nearly, and is very...err, I don't know the right word, but let's just say she doesn't like it when a rule is broken."

"Why?" I asked.

He sat down on the bed beside me. "Olivia's human life isn't a nice one. I don't want to scare you."

"You won't. I lived through the Chucky movies."

He laughed. "Well, I won't go too into detail. Olivia might want to tell you the story herself one day, she won't appreciate it if she found out I told you before she could. And I'm sure I'd miss out something if I told you the whole story."

"What happened?" Curiosity filled me.

"Olivia's mother was accused of being a witch. Olivia had to watch as her mother was dragged onto the stand and burned alive. I can hear Olivia's thoughts, they are filled with the screams of pain coming from her mother. Michael, who can control and feel emotions of humans and vampires, another strange yet fascinating gift, feels what she feels - sorrow, anger, pain, horror.

"She's haunted by it. She always has been, even after three hundred years. It follows her everywhere, the memory will always be with her, and she doesn't have the strength to make it go away or forget it or ignore it. Olivia can be stubborn, hot-headed and strong-willed, but inside she's broken forever. There will always be that part of her, that no matter how hard Jack, Rebecca and the rest of us try to heal, that will always be empty. It's like she's being cut every time she thinks about her mother.

"You see, she doesn't know if she misses her mother more than she hates the people who destroyed her. She would have gone after them, at first she was furious about being a vampire until she found out how easily it was for us to kill people, but Rebecca soon talked her out of it, saying it wouldn't make things any better."

"Many people envy Olivia, they think she has everything she ever wanted and that she is happy. But the truth is, she hasn't. She doesn't have her mother, she doesn't have any happy memories of her, they have all been removed and replaced by that one day when she died. Olivia isn't happy. Some days she can smile and talk to us, but at night she thinks about her mother sometimes and just goes into the forest for a while to think and sob. We don't go after her, as much as we want to we can't. She needs to handle this herself."

All the way through that I felt my heart clench. How horrible. I would never, ever see Olivia as this stuck-up, shallow girl.

"And you know what the worst part about her mothers death was for Olivia?" Carlisle continued. I shook my head. "Her father was the reason her mother died. He turned her in to the guards, accused her of being a witch and sent her to her death. He made Olivia watch as she died."

I caught my breath. "Why would he do that?"

Carlisle shrugged. "I don't know, but it's pretty horrible. Olivia ran away the next day, but she never told us anything that happened since then to the time she became a vampire, just that William found her and changed her because she was dying, close to death."

I looked at the floor. Poor Olivia.

"All our stories are like that. We didn't ask to become vampires. It was just something that happened. We never agreed to it. But Olivia's is one of the hardest out of all of us. I just wanted to explain to you that she isn't as bad as you might have thought. I can't read your thoughts, I wouldn't know what you felt towards her, and Michael doesn't know what you feel either."

Again I didn't say anything.

"I better go home," Carlisle decided, standing up. "Thanks for understanding everything, Esme. Your a good friend."

I got up to my feet and we walked to the front door.

"Bye," He called as he headed towards his car.

"See you tomorrow," I said back, waving.

He got into his car and started it up. My eyes didn't move off the shiny black Volvo until it had left the darkening street.


	18. Prince Charming

It was the 31st of October, which meant Halloween. It was my brother's favorite time of the year, because it meant free sweets, but for me it wasn't so great. I had two main reasons which explained my dislike for the holiday.

Reason 1: The outfits Alice asks me to wear, how short they were and how uncomfortable I was in them.

Reason 2: The party. We didn't go trick or treating, we went to a party at Rosalie's place instead. I hated parties. It wasn't the fact that I would be with my friends, just the fact that it was a party. I didn't enjoy parties.

"You look great!" Alice clapped. She was sat on my bed and I had just walked into wearing the costume she had made for me.

The characters she had picked out where from fairy-tales but their outfits were short and very slutty (her little twist, thanks to the boys). The characters we played were supposed to match us.

I was Little Red Riding Hood.

Alice was, unsurprisingly, Alice in Wonderland.

Rosalie was Goldie-Locks, because Jacob's nickname for her was Blondie or Goldie, so Alice had used that.

Bella was Snow White because out of the four of us she had the darkest hair, even though she was wearing a black wig for this.

I looked in the mirror. I was wearing a short checkered red and white skirt, a white blouse and I had a red hood on, with wolf ears on the top and a tail sticking out...there, from my skirt. My shoes were like the ones from the Wizard of Oz, but not shiny as Alice didn't want me to have tacky shoes, in her opinion. Of course there had to be some horror on me, so my face was pale and the rest of my skin, I was wearing contacts that changed my hazel brown eyes to red, my lips were painted scarlet as well as my nails, and my hair had red streaks down it.

"Smile," Alice said, a camera in her hand.

I smiled, revealing my teeth. Two sharp fangs were there, as if the wolf part of me was still there.

"Perfect," She said. "Now, I'm going to get changed." She swept out of the room gracefully with her costume in her hands.

I sat down on the bed where she had sat a moment ago and started playing with the pleats of my skirt, parting them then smoothing them out.

Alice returned a few minutes later, dressed with her make-up long. I felt a little embarrassed at how long I had taken to get ready, but I had been looking at myself in the mirror for a while trying to figure out if that was really me I was looking at, or just my eyes going funny. Alice was a genius at turning me into someone beautiful.

She was wearing a light blue dress that went to her mid-thigh, the end was white ruffles and the sleeves had a line of black at the end. Over her dress she wore short white apron with two big black buttons at the two top corners. A white hairband was on the top of her head - she would have picked a black one, but you wouldn't have been able to see it, it would have blended in with her short spiky black hair too well - and in the middle was a light blue bow. Her shoes were black and her white socks were pulled up high, a blue bow on each of them that matched the same color as the one on her head.

"Take a picture then," She ordered.

I nodded and snapped a picture of her in her costume, tossing her the camera when I was finished. She caught it and looked at the picture to make sure it was OK.

"What's with the pictures?" I asked her as she smiled at the picture, clearly pleased. "We have been to a Halloween party before."

She rolled her eyes at me as if I was stupid. "Yes, I know, but this will be our second to last party before we leave highschool. And it's always good to take pictures."

"I disagree,"

She sighed. "Come on, we better go." She turned and left the room, dancing down the stairs.

I was a little suprised there was no basket for me to have to carry to complete the outfit. I was glad though. There was no way I was going to carry a little wooden-weaved basket around Rosalie's house like a loon! No way in a million years!

Larry was already out, his friends had taken him trick or treating, so I locked the door behind us. Alive drove us towards Rosalie's house, humming along to the music.

"There's something I have to tell you, but I waited until there was child-locks on your door to stop you from bolting when you heard it." Alice grinned at me.

I felt very curious and a little worried. "What is it?"

"Well, Rosalie invited the Cullen's."

"All of them?" I couldn't keep the disbelief out of my voice.

"Well, she invited Carlisle, then remembered how close he and his siblings were, so told him it was OK for them to tag along as well."

Stupid child-locks! "Oh no," I groaned.

She narrowed her eyes in confusion. "What's wrong? I thought you liked Carlisle? I thought you were friends? Sometimes its really hard to keep up with you two. One day you can't stand each other, then your friends, then you hate each other again! It's confusing!"

"It confuses me as well sometimes." I admitted. "And we are friends."

"Then what's the problem?" She asked.

I sighed. "It's the fact that he's going to see me dressed like this!" I pointed at the short skirt and blouse which had the two top buttons removed.

"Maybe he'll like it." She shrugged. "Maybe he'll realize how much he likes you and the two of you will start dating!"

"That's not what I want."

"Why? The other day you were blushing when he looked at you." She was still puzzled. I knew I wasn't explaining this anymore, so I took a deep breath and confessed.

"With Carlisle, its so easy, just being friends. I feel like I can talk to him about anything. I know I have you and Rose and Bella and the guys, but with Carlisle it's different. Its like he listens to every word I say, thinks carefully about his answer and then speaks. I don;t want our friendship to turn into dating, not right now anyway. I like it the way it is. If we dated and then split up, that would be horrible. It's like we need each other. But if we broke up we wouldn't speak and it would kill me. His siblings would probably kill me as well." Literally. "I just want us to take things slow, and if that means being friends for years, then so be it. I'm not even sure if I want Carlisle as my boyfriend. Being friends is less complicated, so much easier."

She nodded when I finished. "I know what you mean, it was like that for me and Jasper at the start, and the others. Remember when we all dated other people? Like you dated Edward,"

I smiled. "For a week, then he found love in Bella and we broke up. I'm glad we're friends though."

"Same with me and Emmett, and for Jasper and Rose. We all dated the wrong people at first, like we dated the knights, then found our Prince Charmings."

It was a stupid, girly metaphor, but I smiled at her. "Yeah, you guys are lucky."

"Maybe Carlisle is your Prince Charming."

I shrugged as if she was making a joke, but I could see that she was serious. "Maybe, all I need to do is prick my finger on a spinning wheel and fall asleep for a year and wait for him. Either that or find seven dwarfs and eat a poisonous apple!"

She smiled, playing along with the joke. "I'd stick to your character if I were you, wait for your grandmother to become a wolf and have Carlisle rescue you."

I laughed. "Now all I need to do is find a wolf in Forks!"

* * *

**I'm trying to download at least one chapter every night for this story and my other one, but it is difficult with homework and stuff. This is just a quick chapter of some best friend bonding time between Alice and Esme. **


	19. A full moon on Halloween

The music was playing loudly and loads of people were already dancing and singing alone. I spent the first few minutes of the party talking to Rosalie - who was dressed in golden and white, looking just like what I would think Goldilocks would look like if she came to life - and Emmett, who was dressed as a Superhero. Jasper and Alice were talking a little further away, she was laughing to something he had said. Jasper was dressed as a pirate and Alice had taken the parrot of his shoulder and held it in her hands, smiling at him. I bet she had told him how silly it was, or how much she adored him.

Knowing Emmett and Rosalie would like some time to talk to each other in private, I excused myself into the smaller living room. Edward and Bella were there and I sat with them, trying to decide how to sit properly in this skirt.

"The parties get better every year," Bella, who I had thought hated parties as much as I did, said brightly, looking around at the decorated house.

Edward nodded in agreement. "Yeah, and not a bad selection of candy this time."

I rolled my eyes at him. "Is that all you ever look for at a Halloween party?"

Edward laughed. "Yeah, and for Bella." Bella giggled at that. Edward's eyes moved to notice something behind me. "It looks like Cullen is looking for you though."

I looked over my shoulder. Carlisle, wearing casual jeans and a top, was stood by the door, looking at me. I blushed and looked away, not knowing what to do.

"Go talk to him," Bella urged.

I sighed, knowing I couldn't ignore him. I got up, knowing he would be looking at my skirt and wolf tail, turned on my heels and heading over to him. I didn't miss the quick smile that formed on his face as I approached.

"Hey," I said as I stopped in front of him.

"Hey, nice costume." He said, his eyes looking up and down slowly. "Very nice, it suits you, you should keep your hair like that."

"With red in it?"

He nodded. "Yeah, it's nice."

"Alice picked it out."

"It looks nice on you." He commented, smiling again. "Do you want to go for a walk? This music is a little...loud."

"Little? It's deafening me!" Trying to ignore the look Bella sent me, I walked with Carlisle out of the house. We headed towards the river outside Rosalie's house and I sat down the swing, Carlisle sitting down on the grass and leaning back on his hands to look at the moon.

"It's beautiful tonight," He said softly.

I nodded. "Yeah, a full moon on Halloween, that's creepy."

"Do you like Halloween?" He asked.

"No, not really." I admitted.

"Why?"

I gestured back to the house. "Parties,"

"Well, I think this Halloween. I get to talk to you outside of school for once."

I blushed and bit my lower lip shyly. "You know, you could always come down to the beach with us, or the movies, or to my place to hang up."

"I might look into the hanging out at your place and the movies, but not the beach."

"Oh yeah, I forgot."

"The dog told you everything about that then?"

I glared at him. "Jacob isn't a dog! He's a human boy!"

"For now maybe," He muttered. Had I heard him right? I shook it off, deciding not to be bothered.

"Carlisle, can I ask you something?" I asked, not looking at him.

"Sure," He said.

I sighed. "We are just friends, right?"

I knew he was looking at me, I could feel his eyes on me, burning my skin. I focused on the river, on the rushing water which surface reflected the silver moonlight.

Then he answered and I stiffened. "Yes, didn't I make that clear in the first place?"

"Yes, but Alice and I were talking before the party, in the car, and she asked me if we were going to be more than friends soon, like we would start dating or something, like she did with Jasper."

"What did you say?"

"I said that it was easier to be friends with you, less complicated." I said, again not meeting his gaze.

"I see," He said.

Was that hurt in his voice? No, surely it wasn't. Was it?

"Let's just say if we had feelings for each other, what would happen then?" He asked suddenly, surprising me. "If,"

I swallowed. Great. And I said it was easy to talk to him! "Well, I know I would have been too much of a chicken to admit them."

"I guess it would be easier if I could hear your thoughts."

"That would be cheating though!" I accused, trying to lighten the mood.

It didn't work.

"Would you really keep it a secret from me? If you cared about me and had feelings for me that were strong, would you just ignore them?"

This time I looked at him. His eyes were shadowed by hurt and confusion. Why should he feel hurt? Had I really upset him that much.

I sighed. "Um."

"What if the feeling was something that you couldn't ignore, that it was so strong every time you saw me you wanted to kiss me? Imagine what that must be like, to see the person you love everyday and know you cannot be with them."

"That sounds horrible."

He got up. "Yeah, it is."

"What?"

"That feeling, that torn feeling, the one where you see the person you love yet you cannot do anything about it, I get that everyday. Whenever I look at you I get it."

I looked up at him. "Carlisle, what are you talking about?"

"I...I'm falling in love with you, Esme. I can't stop it."

Then before I knew what was happening, he was bending down and his hands were on either side of my face. Then he brought his lips to mine and sealed them together.


	20. Battlefield

I gasped in shock as his lips brushed against mine, my eyes widening, but then they softened and I loosened my shoulders to relax. My hands were locked firmly on the swing's ropes that attached it to the tree branch, his hands on my face to cradle it as the kiss continued.

I was kissing Carlisle. I was kissing a vampire!

Did I have bad breath? Oh please, don't let me have bad breath! Would that mint I had an hour ago still have the faintest chance of making my mouth smell like mint?

Wait, why was I worrying about what my breath smelt like? He was kissing me, so surely it must smell nice.

I shivered with delight. He was kissing me.

The kiss ended and we were left standing, while I was sitting and he was standing, looking at each other in shock and wonder.

He cleared his throat and ruffled his hair. "I'm sorry,"

I jumped back, almost falling off the swing. I caught the ropes just in time and pulled myself back up to sit still. I tried to kind my tongue, but it had vanished.

When I found it, I was surprised that I was shouting at him. "What the hell was that?"

He looked embarrassed, his eyes widening in shock as if my demand had taken him by surprise, and then looked angry. "A kiss?"

"That's not what I meant!"

He folded his arms across his chest and I thought I heard him growl. "What did you mean then, Esme? Tell me!"

I glared up at him. "I meant that you don't just say something like that and then kiss me!"

"I thought you wanted to kiss me,"

"What gave you that idea?" I demanded, furious for some reason. Why was I mad at him? It wasn't like he had cut my hand off or something.

He looked away from me. "Nothing."

"Then why?"

Carlisle shrugged. "Instinct, a little voice in my head, lots of things. Like I said, I'm sorry."

"Well, then that's OK then, isn't it?" I snarled with heavy sarcasm.

"It's really hard to keep up with you sometimes Esme."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"You wanted to be friends with me, you just said a minute ago that you feel more comfortable around me than anyone else, even that dog you call your best friend, but now you hate me because I kissed you. What's all that about?"

I got off of the swing, not bothering to answer that.

"Where are you going?" He demanded instantly straightening.

"Back to the party," I hissed over my shoulder. "Bye, Carlisle."

"Esme, wait!" He called, starting after me.

I froze and turned to look at him, still boiling with anger. "And one more thing, before I go. Jacob isn't a dog! He's a better friend that you were, he doesn't kiss me when I don't ask!"

I stormed towards the house and inside, searching for Rose or Alice or Bella to tell them how wrong they had been about Carlisle. I didn't know if Carlisle was still down at the river, or if he was walking slowly towards the house. All I knew was I didn't care.

Olivia was watching me carefully with Sophia at hr side. They had both seen me leaving with Carlisle, they were probably wondering where their brother was.

A hand grabbed my arm and pulled me towards the stage that was in the centre of the room. Alice smiled at me. "Time for singing!"

"What?" My eyes widened.

"Oh come on, remember how we always have a karaoke at this party?"

I sighed.

"You have a nice voice," Alice said, handing me a mic.

"What am I singing?" I was too stressed out to care.

She smiled. "Battlefield, by Jordin Sparks."

I knew that song well and knew all the lyrics, so that was OK. "Fine,"

She left me on the stage with Rosalie and Bella, who would be the echo's of the song and the backup singers I was guessing while Alice went to speak to Jasper while we sang, and the music started.

The door opened and Carlisle walked in, flanked by Michael and Jack though I was puzzled where his brothers had sprung from, just as we started to sing. His eyes glanced over to me for a second.

I opened my mouth and started to sing, wishing Alice had picked any other song than this one.

_Don't try to explain your mind I know what's happening here_

_One minute its love then suddenly its like a battlefield_

_One word turns into (er)_

_Why is it smallest things that tear us down_

_My world's nothing when your gone_

_I'm out here without a shield_

_Can't go back now_

_Both hands tied behind my back for nothing (oh no)_

_These times when we climb so fast to fall again_

_I never meant to start a war_

_You know I never wanna hurt you_

_Don't even know what we're fighting for_  
_Why does love always feel like a battlefield_

_A battlefield, a battlefield?Why does love always feel like a battlefield?_

_A battlefield, a battlefield?_

_I guess you better go and get your armor(Get your armor)_

_Get your armor_

_I guess you better go and get your armor(Get your armor)_

_Get your armor_

_I guess you better go and get your armor _

_We could pretend that we are friends tonight(Oh, oh, oh)_

_And in the morning we'll wake up and we'll be alright_

_'Cause baby, we don't have to fight_

_And I don't want this love to feel like  
A battlefield, a battlefield, a battlefield_

_Why does love always feel like a battlefield_

_A battlefield, a battlefield_

_I guess you better go and get your armor_

_I never meant to start a war_

_You know I never wanna hurt you_

_Don't even know what we're fighting for(Fighting, fighting for)  
_

_Why does love always feel like a battlefield_

_A battlefield, a battlefield?_

_Why does love always feel like a battlefield_

_A battlefield, a battlefield?  
_

_I guess you better go and get your armor(Get your armor)_

_Get your armor_

_I guess you better go and get your armor(Get your armor)_

_Get your armor  
_

_Why does love always feel like?Why does love always feel like?A battlefield, a battlefield_

I never meant to start a war

_Don't even know what we're fighting for_

_I never meant to start a war_

_Don't even know what we're fighting for_


	21. Sophia's advice

Shakily I got off of the stage and headed towards the drink stand. I heard footsteps behind me and thought it was Carlisle, so I didn't look around.

"You know that's rude," An unfamiliar voice came from behind me. "You knew I wanted to speak to you, yet you still ignore me. I thought you would have been taught manners when you were younger."

I turned around and saw Sophia standing behind me. Her voice had been smooth, like honey, and reminded me of her brother too much. I winced.

"Sorry, I thought you were someone else." I said. Why was she talking to me? Before now she had looked ready to kill me. So why now?

"I'm here to talk to you about that certain someone." Sophia said. "Listen, my brother is a great guy, and he doesn't deserve to have his heart-broken by someone who can't make up their mind. I've seen you two together, I've seen what you are like in the future. Well, I saw that when you were friends. I saw the kiss. But now, I can't see anything."

"Why should you care?" I asked.

"Why shouldn't I care?" She demanded, looking horrified. "He's my brother! I love him, I care about him. And I hate what happened between you two. It was just a kiss."

"A kiss I wasn't ready for,"

"But is that a good enough reason to break his heart?"

"Look, I'm not ready for this kind of thing. I used to date boys all the time, a new guy every week." I stopped myself from trembling. "I'm tired of that. I'm not going to get crushed again, no way."

"Who said that Carlisle would hurt you? Who said he isn't deeply in love with you? Yes, I said isn't, not wasn't, because he still is in love with you."

"I'm not ready," I repeated. Why didn't she get it?

Then she understood. "Just be friends with him then! It isn't hard. That way neither of you would get hurt and you would both just have to wait until you are ready to start something."

"I'll never be ready," I shook my head. "And making him be friends with me first won't help or change things. If anything it will make them worse."

"Why can't you be friends with him?"

"Because he kissed me!"

"Edward kissed you though, didn't he? Yet your still best friends with him."

"That's different."

"How is that different?"

I wanted to scream. "He and I were dating at the time! I asked him to kiss me, and sometimes I would be the one to start the kiss. This is completely different."

She sighed, her voice lowering and she calmed down. "Esme, you may not see it, but the rest of us do. You and Carlisle are meant to be together. You are perfect for one another. Its like you complete one another, like two pieces of a puzzle."

My head was spinning.

"You need to talk to Carlisle." She urged. "Sort things out with him."

I sighed. I really needed to lie down.

"I know my brother. For a ninety years he's been alone, always on the outside. The rest of us have boyfriends or husbands, girlfriends or wives. Carlisle doesn't. Because he's been waiting for that special someone. He's been waiting for you!"

OK, that made what I was going to say next sound stupid.

"You know, when we first found out that Carlisle told you about our secret - well, that you knew anyway, I don't think he told you - we were all furious. But then I was happy. Rebecca is too. We were happy because Carlisle has found that person he can confined in, tell anything to. And you should see the difference in him now since he met you. He actually smiles and talks to us more often instead of just nodding along to whatever we are saying."

"But I'm a human,"

"So?"

"Even if I did have feelings for him..."

"So you do like him! As in like him like him!"

"I didn't say that, I said if."

"If can sometimes mean you are just hiding the truth." She interrupted me again. "Sorry,"

"If I did like him, nothing could happen between us. Or it would be pointless anyway. Because he's a vampire." It felt weird to say the name out loud, but I was getting used to it.

Sophia sighed. "Are you going to let that one fact come between you two? I've seen it, Esme, you're meant to be together forever."

"How?"

"Just talk to him. He told me not to speak to you about this sort of thing, so I'm already breaking the rule."

"But if your already breaking it, why not just break it all together? What did you mean?"

She looked away. "Just go and talk to him."

"So many people have said that to me recently," I complained. "What if I don't want to talk to him?"

"It's either talk to him now, or talk to him never." She said. "Pick one,"

"I'd go for never."

"Why do you hate him all of a sudden?"

I sighed. "I don't know."

She narrowed her eyes. "That's not really a good reason."

"Because he kissed me!"

"To show that he liked you!"

This conversation was going nowhere other than in circles.

"Don't talk to him," Olivia joined us. I shivered at her voice, it was as cold as ice.

Sophia glanced at her, bewildered. "What?"

Olivia's glare stayed on me, but she answered her sister. "I don't want him having his heart-broken by you again." She hissed. "Once is enough times!"

A white hand was on her shoulder, stopping her from hissing again at me. I looked up to see Carlisle. He was looking at his sister, ignoring me. "We're leaving now."

Olivia straightened and, with one last angry glance at me, followed her brother out of the house. Sophia gave me a small smile before dashing after them.

I was left stood by the drinks table watching them leave, my head spinning.


	22. Hold me and Kiss me

Breathe, breathe, breathe, I reminded myself as I crossed the car park towards the black car. Two days had passed since the Halloween party, that had been nearly enough time to calm down and think about what I would say to him.

Once I got to the Volvo I waited, leaning against the concrete wall in front of its hood. I picked at my nail varnish, an old habit that had followed me into high school.

Carlisle walked out from the English building with his siblings, as always he looked like a movie-star. He spotted me and shared a glance with Sophia, who nodded and said something to the others. The Olivia, Jack, Michael and Sophia climbed into the convertible.

I straightened up when Carlisle appeared. His face was a mask, stone-like, so still without any expression on it. It made me want to shiver at the unfriendliness.

"Your ride is over there," Carlisle said, flicking his hair to where Edward and Bella were waiting by their car.

"OK, I guess I deserve this coldness." I sighed. "Carlisle, I'm really sorry."

His eyes glazed with anger. "Sorry? And that's meant to make everything OK?"

"No!" I said instantly. "I am sorry though, I just wanted to show you that I am. Carlisle, if I hurt you..."

"Hurt," He echoed, shaking his head in disbelief. "You didn't hurt me Esme. I think permenatly wounded is a better way to describe what I felt."

I swallowed.

"You see, for me to admit what I felt for you was hard enough, but to see you walk away from me without feeling the same thing was harder. I guess I should have known you didn't like me in that way."

"Carlisle, I do like you!" I said without thinking.

He looked up, but he didn't look happy or hopeful, just annoyed. "There you go again, changing your mind fro one feeling to the other."

"Carlisle," I said in a voice as low as a whisper. "I am sorry. It kills me to see you like this. I do like you, in the same way you like me."

"Then what's the problem? You only date humans?"

I shook my head. "I'm just not ready for dating yet. You know my old boyfriend cheated on me? It wasn't Edward, it was a guy named Liam Davis, he was a junior, but he left. He cheated on me, he lied and said that he had broken up with his girlfriend, and then Rosalie caught them together at the mall kissing. After that I've had a hard time...trusting people."

His eyes softened, but just a little, and he didn't say anything.

"I didn't want to start something with you knowing that half of me will always be unsure. I hate how I am not able to trust you completely. But it feels as if I can't trust anybody right now." I continued. "You know, everyone sees me as the popular, pretty girl who has everything in life. But the truth is everything has gone wrong. So much has happened to me these past few years. I lost my dad, my mom has become this drunken nightmare who somedays doesn't even remember my name, my brother feels he can't tell me things, he thinks I've forgotten about my dad when every day I think about him and..." I broke up when I had to cover my mouth when the sobs started. Tears were welling up in my eyes.

Then I felt strong arms around me and breathed in Carlisle's scent.

His voice surprised me. It was warm and comforting, no hint of anger left. I pressed my head into his shoulder, my whole body shaking as the sobs grew and the tears ran down my cheeks, wetting his shirt but he didn't seem to care.

His cheek was resting on the top of my head and I soon found myself relaxing, my shoulders becoming less tense, and melting into his hold. He was cold, hard but it was nice to have his arms around me.

I let out a sigh.

"It's OK," He said softly. "Esme, it's OK."

I sniffed. "No, it isn't. The way I've treated you, it isn't OK. It's selfish."

"Your not selfish," He said, tightening his hold on me. "I shouldn't have kissed you like that, without warning and without asking, without being sure there was something between us."

I looked up at him. "There is something between us, there always has been." I waited for his reply.

Then he smiled. "So, what happens next?" He asked.

"You are going to kiss me again," I declared.

He lowered his head down to mine and his lips pressed against mine soflty, his hands moving up to cradle my face like they had done before. My hands travelled to his strong back, holding him there.

When we broke apart, he looked down at me. "Need a lift home?"

I smiled at him. "Yes, please."

He opened the door for me and I sat down on the soft seat of the Volvo. He closed the door then walked around the back, getting in to sit beside me. We drove out of the car parking lot and I tried not to think about the knowing look Edward and Bella had shared as we passed them.

"So, are we friends or...?" He hesitated.

I bit my lower lip. "I guess that kiss makes us more than friends. Wouldn't you agree?"

He nodded. "Defiantly. But we can take things slowly, if you want."

"Does that mean I'm going to have to wait another two months for you to kiss me again?" I asked.

Carlisle chuckled. "Would that be a problem?"

I nodded. "Yes, you are a good kisser, I'll give you that."

He laughed again. "Esme, I'm going to promise you something. That Liam guy didn't deserve someone like you. He cheated on you, and I would never do that. I promise you that you will be my only girlfriend from now till..."

"Forever," I whispered. "I don't think I ever want to loose you Carlisle, now that I have you."

I saw him smile. "And I never want to loose you either, Esme. You know, when a vampire falls in love, they never fall out of it."

"Does that rule apply to every vampire?"

"It defiantly applies to me. I haven't really seen girls since I met you. They are they, but they don't really have faces."

"Just bodies,"

He looked like that had offended him, then chuckled a little. "I don't really notice their bodies either. I only notice you."

"Wow, I'm impressed." I teased. "There are a lot of good looking girls at this school."

"None of them are as beautiful as you though."

I couldn't help smile and turned to look out of the window. "Carlisle?" I asked when a moment of silence passed between us.

"Yes?" He replied.

"What will your family think? Surely it's not common for a vampire to...fall in love with a human, right?"

He sighed and shook his head. "No, it's not common at all. I guess you could say it is frowned upon. It's very rare, we normally fall for others of our kind. But just because it isn't common doesn't mean it isn't true. My feelings for you are evidence that we can love humans."

I blushed at his words. "And what do your family think about this?"

"I'm sure they won't be happy at first, but if they want me to be happy, they're live with it. Rebecca wouldn't care if you had three eyes, she cares about my happiness more than anyone else in our family, and William would never disagree with her even if he is against all of this."

I swallowed. "Olivia?"

"Let's just say, I might only have one arm tomorrow."


	23. Growls and anger

"Jacob called," Larry reported as I walked into the house with Carlisle behind me. My brother was playing with his small collection of cars he had inherited from my grandfather. "Hey, Carlisle."

"Hey," Carlisle said.

I glanced at the phone. "I better call him back, it might be important."

Carlisle dipped his head. "Take your time. I'll be right here."

I took the phone and, as I walked into the kitchen, punched in Jake's number.

After four beeps, Jake picked up. "Esme?" He guessed.

"Yep," I said, popping my lips on the p. "Hi,"

I hadn't expected what happened next.

I had never heard Jake shout before, and it was a sound I had never wanted to hear.

"What the hell did you think you were doing?!" He demanded, furious.

If he wasn't so mad, I would have laughed to calm him down. Laughing was the last thing I wanted to do right now though. "Wow, Jake, calm down. You sound like an adult." I decided gentle teasing was the best way to calm him.

I was wrong though, of course.

"It's kind of hard to calm down after I heard that you got kissed my a leech!" He spat the last word out in disgust.

I rolled my eyes. "Carlisle isn't a leech. And who told you anyway?"

"Alice phoned me to see if we were all meeting up this weekend, like we did on Friday, and she told me about it."

Damn, Alice! I made a mental note to talk to her later.

I tried to keep my voice steady when I replied. "Jake, since when did you care about who I kiss?"

"Since when do you go around kissing disgusting blood-suckers?"

"Um, since half an hour ago."

He hissed. "That's not funny! Seriously, Esme, I thought you had more sense than that!"

"I told him to kiss me! Your overreacting Jake!"

"Overreacting?"

"Yes!"

"I don't think I am."

"Well I do!"

Carlisle was suddenly at the doorway, leaning against the frame with one shoulder. He looked at me and saw the look on my face. "Is everything OK?" He asked, sounding worried.

"Speaking of the leech," Jake muttered.

"Shut-up Jake!" I said.

"Let me talk to him," Carlisle offered calmly. "Before either of you say something you might regret."

sighed and passed him the phone. I knew it was a bad move, but was too tired and frustrated to care. I would wait in the kitchen though to make sure Jake didn't go too over the top and annoy Carlisle - I didn't really want to have to explain to my mom why our phone was snapped into two.

Carlisle took the phone and, as he did so, gave me a little reassuring smile that told me he wasn't going to stir any trouble with Jake. I relaxed immediately.

"Jacob, it's me." Carlisle said, his voice calm but hard at the same time.

Jacob was still shouting, I could hear him been though I couldn't understand what he was saying, and Carlisle's face was unreadable. I knew he had done that on purpose, kept his face still so I couldn't tell what was happening.

"Yes, we kissed, but I would never dream if hurting her, Jacob. I tried to keep her safe. I ignored her, made sure we weren;t friends so she would be safe, but it wasn't easy for either of us. I love her, and for some reason she feels the same way about me."

How could he say that? How did he think he was the lucky one? How did he think he was the plain and boring one who had the love of an angel? It was the other way around, everyone knew it, everyone would see it when they looked at us.

I heard Jake make a disgusted sound, as if the thought of vampires having feelings was actually funny.

Carlisle remained calm. "I know you are concerned about her well-being, and your hatred towards me doesn't help anything, but plea eunderstand that I would never hurt her. That might be hard for you to understand, but it's the truth.

Another pause. Even though I knew it must have lasted only for a few seconds, for me it seemed to last for a whole hour, horrible, long and annoying.

"Yes, I'm at hers right now." Carlisle said and then paused, Jacob had said something in reply to that.

Then Carlisle sighed and ended the call. "He's on his way here right now."

I swallowed. "You should go," I said, knowing that Carlisle being here wouldn't help anything, as much as I wanted him to stay. I would have to talk to Jake, alone.

But Carlisle shook his head. "No, I'm staying here. You look ready to fall over. Besides, he wants to talk to me. And someone will need to be here to hold you back from punching him." He looked as if the thought amused him though, his eyes glistening.

I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts. "He's never been that mad at me before...How could he even think you would hurt me?" I was really confused.

Carlisle's face twisted in pain. "Esme, he's right. He knows my strengths. He knows that I can split a water pipe in half with my bare hands. And your human body is so breakable, so fragile..."

"But you wouldn't hurt me." I said determinedly, believing in my words.

His eyes locked with mine. "Of course I wouldn't, not consciously. But there might be a time where someone like me hurt you, or I did, if I got too mad and you were standing too close...and besides, there are other kinds of ways of breaking a human, not just physically."

"What do you mean?" I asked, allow half of me already knew the answer. I was trying my hardest not to start shaking.

He sighed. "I could, for example, break your heart."

I gulped. "And are you planning on...on breaking my heart anytime soon?"

"Never," He said. "As long as you'll have me and want me."

"I'll always want you," I said. The thought of living without Carlisle was a horrible one, one that I hoped I would never have to go through.

Carlisle moved forward and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me into his cold embrace. I pressed my cheek against his check and balled my hands into fists. Now that I was in the safety of his arms, I felt alright to cry, comfortable with it.

He put his finger under my chin and lifted my head up. Leaning down, he brushed his lips against mine, sealing them together. My hands moved up his chest to wrap around his neck and he placed his own hands on my waist.

And then the doorbell rang, too soon in my opinion. Carlisle looked a little reluctant as well, he had wanted the kiss to continue a little louder as much as I had.

Carlisle glanced at the door quickly, but his golden eyes soon rested on me again. "Jake's here."

"Already?" That was quick, it must be twenty minutes from his house to here. Had time really been that fast? Or had he gone over the speeding-limit to get here? Probably it was the second option.

"Don't be too harsh on him," Carlisle advised. "He is your best friend."

"For now," I grumbled.

He chuckled lightly. "I don't blame him for being a little overprotective of you, and a little worried. I am the words deadliest predator."

I smiled up at him. "Wait until you see me really mad at someone, then you'll be the second."

The doorbell rang three times, sharp and impatient.

Carlisle took my hand in his cold touch and squeezed it lightly. I could see the effort it took him to make sure he didn't hurt me.

I headed towards the door with Carlisle behind me. As much as I liked the feeling of my hand in his, I decided it would be wiser not to do that in front of Jake, he was already moody with me as it was.

Jake wasn't standing in front of the door, he had retreated to the edge of the woods. I gasped when I saw him. He still had the same russet-coloured skin and his recently cut hair, but there were a lot more changes to him. He had always been that big? And how had he suddenly become so muscular? And I noticed something black and round on one of his shoulders. It was a tattoo.

Larry, too busy playing with his cars, didn't notice Carlisle and I slip out of the house. He knew where to find food if he was hungry, and he was used to be alone.

I walked towards Jacob, well aware of his furious eyes that were black with anger. They kept flicking from me, to Carlisle, to me again. Each time he looked at me I wanted to run.

I couldn't put my finger on it, but there was something different about Jake. He seemed much taller and muscular, and the tattoo made him so much different from that teenage boy who had hung out with me every weekend in his garage when he would make the cars or motorbikes and I would watch, providing the conversation.

I realized that he suddenly looked more menacing, more dangerous.

"Jacob." Carlisle greeted him as he and I stood in front of Jacob.

Jacob just answered in a low growl that rippled through his teeth which made him sound like a predator.

Then I noticed something moving in the shadows. I couldn't make out the shapes, just that there were two of them, and they were big. Jacob's head twitched back towards them I noticed, like he was listening to what they were saying or something, like they were communicating.

"May I ask, why did you come down here?" Carlisle's voice was forever calm and smooth. "Was there something that we couldn't possibly speak about over the phone?"

"At least here, if you bug me, I can rip your head of easier."

My eyes widened. This wasn't the Jacob I knew.

"Let me remind you about the treaty." Carlisle said calmly.

"The treaty says nothing about fighting!" Jacob spat furiously.

"Think about the pack. Would you really want them to risk their lives because you were being stupid and cocky? Think about your pack before yourself Jacob, like a loyal wolf should."

I stared at Carlisle in confusion. "Pack? Wolves? What?"

Jacob's eyes glowed with what looked like satisfaction. "You haven't told her?"

"I think the question should be for you, after these past months you haven't told your best friend what you really were?"

Jacob stiffened. "You know I can't! But I would have let her fingure it out, she's smart. I've already dropped a few hints.

"Did you really expect me to give away your secret like that?"

"Your doing it right now!"

"Now, I'm simply saying things, but not revealing the truth. I believe I should leave that to you."

I turned my head towards Jacob. "What's going on? Tell me!"

Jacob sighed. "Not here, not with your brother so close."

"Then we'll go deeper into the woods," I said bravely, desperate to find out what was happening. What was Carlisle on about? Jacob was human, like me. Human!

Jacob looked at Carlisle. "You'd put her in that much danger?"

"I know you wouldn't hurt her," Carlisle growled. "And if you did attempt, you would be the one getting hurt, mutt."

Jacob spat at him and then looked back at me.

A growl rippled through the air, but it hadn't come from either Carlisle or Jacob. It was coming from the shadow, from one of the shapes. I shivered.

"Not here, and not now." Jacob decided. "Sam thinks we should have a talk later on, Cullen. Your family and the pack. We need to sort out a few things that have to do with the treaty."

"Can Esme come? That way she can find out the truth. It will be safer for her to be with us, so we can protect her."

Jacob shot him another glare. "Do you think I would hurt her?"

"I know what your kind do when they loose control. It wouldn't be your fault, just the wolf inside you."

Another growl, impatient this time, sounded.

Jacob sighed. "Fine, meet us in the clearing five miles from here."

"What time?" Carlisle asked.

"Midnight, better make sure the humans are asleep." Jacob growled before turning and disappearing into the shadows before I could even say goodbye to him.


	24. Off to the clearing

"So, whats the plan?" I asked as Carlisle and I turned back towards the house and started walking to it.

"I'm going to the meeting, your staying here and going to sleep."

"No," I said stubbornly. "I was invited. And I want to come, I want to finally understand what you two were talking about."

"Esme, it's very dangerous."

"What is?"

He sighed. "My family and the pack don't get along, even with the treaty. Its the treaty that stops us from killing each other, and trust me, we all feel tempted sometimes."

"The pack?"

"You'll understand soon."

"So I'm coming?"

He glanced at me. "Your very stubborn."

I smiled, triumphant. "Alright, I'll pretend to go to sleep and you'll come and get me. I'll seek out the window or something."

He shook his head. "No, I'll come and get you. You wait in your room. Make sure you wear something warm, it's going to get chilly tonight and it will be hard for all of us to concentrate with your teeth clattering all night."

I could tell that he was still annoyed that I would be coming along, not because I would be there but because of the 'danger' I would be in, but it made me feel warm inside to hear him ask me to do something that would keep me warm, because he cared about me. But the truth was, I didn't see what would be so dangerous. I knew Jacob and his friends really well. They were jokers, young teenagers without a care in the world, how could they possibly be dangerous? Whenever I was around them I didn't feel scared, instead I felt the opposite, safe and protected because I knew that they would never hurt me and they wouldn't let anything or anyone hurt me.

But apparently I didn't know them as well as I had thought...

"I'll be at your house at half eleven, but you should get some rest before. I'll wake you up."

"You'll need to sleep too," I said.

He shook his head. "Vampires don't sleep. I'll be fine."

"Oh. Well, what are you going to do in the meantime?"

"If it's OK with you, I'll stay here for a few more hours, and then go hunting. If I'm going to be near...them, I need my strength and control."

I nodded. "You can stay here as long as you want,"

"Do you mind if I use your phone? I left my mobile at my place. I need to call William and tell him whats happening and when to bring everyone to the field."

I gulped.

"What's wrong?" He asked, instantly worried, stopping. I stopped as well.

I sighed. "This is going to be the first time I'll meet your...whole family."

"I know, it's a little soon, don't you think? I would have waited a while, but now it seems I don't have a choice."

"Am I really that much of an embarrassment?"

"No, I just think it would be better for you not to be in a room filled with vampires. I don't want you running out of the house screaming."

I smiled. "You just ruined it! I was planning that escape to be really dramatic!"

* * *

It was hard to sleep that night. I kept wiggling around in my bed, trying to get comfortable, but every time I moved it got more and more uncomfortable, as if I was lying in thorns, either stay still and be uncomfortable, or more and become even more uncomfortable.

I slept for three hours. All the time I was wondering about what had happened, what had been said earlier. It made no sense to me. Hopefully I would understand soon.

It was eleven o'clock now, so I decided to get dressed and ready so I wouldn't hold Carlisle up. I wondered how he would get into the house, but decided not to worry about it. He would find a way.

I got out a pair of jeans and a thick jumper, knowing it would be cold outside. I had a quick wash, not wanting to have a shower in case the noise woke Larry up (no worries about my mom waking up, she was fast asleep on the couch downstairs, home surprisingly early actually, and wouldn't notice if a car drove into the back of the house) and got dressed.

I also plucked my eyebrows, shaved my legs, and tried to make myself look as presentable as possible. I would be meeting William and Rebecca, the two vampires from the Cullen family I hadn't meant yet. I wanted to make sure I looked alright.

When I walked out of the bathroom, I jumped and covered my mouth with my hand before I could scream.

"Did I scare you?" Carlisle asked.

He was sat on the armchair, waiting for me to finish. I checked the time. Well I had spent thirty minutes locked in a bathroom before, it wasn't any surprise at how long it had taken me.

I nodded. I couldn't lie, not when he had seen my reaction with his own eyes. "Yes, how did you get in anyway?"

"Window," He titled his head to where he had come in. "It was easy to climb that tree outside, although I could tell the tree was old."

I put away my things and walked over to him. "Sorry I took so long in there, I was trying to make myself look...nice."

He took my hand and pulled me down so I was sitting on his lap. I put my arms around his neck, knowing already this was how he would get be out of the house.

His lips were near my ear. "You always look nice, Esme. More than nice actually. Beautiful isn't enough to describe you."

I couldn't stop the color that rose to my cheeks. I looked at the clock. "Ready to go?"

He nodded. "I guess we better get it over and done with."

"Why don't you like Jacob?" I asked as he got up and, after placing me on the floor gently and kissing my cheek, started opening the window.

He froze. "Um...it's a long story. I'll tell you it in the car, but you'll probably only here most of it, the clearing isn't that far away."

Then he was gone.

I rushed over to the window and looked around. "Carlisle?"

"Down here," He whispered. He was stood looking up at me. "Jump!"

"Are you crazy?" I hissed.

He shook his head. "No. Just turn your light off, stand outside the window, close it, then jump. I promise I'll catch you."

I trusted him. I slid out of the window and, balancing on the outside of it, I closed it shut. Then I closed my eyes as well and jumped.


	25. The Clearing

It was dark outside as we rode towards the west. I had no idea where we were going, just that it would be a clearing, and his family would be there and some unwanted guests - who I guess were Jake and his friends.

Stars glistened in the raven-black sky and I could see the faintest out lines of the clouds. Carlisle had said that the rain should hold off until four or three in the morning, giving us plenty of time to talk.

I was really confused. First I was confused with Jacob. What was with the tattoo? And how had he come so big and muscular so soon? Had he been working out at the gym every minute of every day? No, that wasn't possible, was it? And he had never been that tall. Now he must be around six foot three or something insane. Had he literally been stretched? I laughed at the thought.

And what was with the attitude? The Jacob Black I had known and loved, who had been my best friend for years, had been warm and friendly, funny and kind. The Jacob Black I had met a few hours ago was completely different. This Jacob was cold, on edge, always alert, tense for a fight, dangerous looking...the differences between that Jacob and the one I had known was a long list.

Then I was confused about what Jacob could possibly be. I had known him since i was one year old. He had - if he still was, i wasn't sure - been my best friend since then.

But I knew the warm skin, the tattoo, the reason behind the sudden decision to cut his hair really short, the muscles and the height he had gotten to were not something that had happened for nothing. Something was different with Jacob, it was changing his personalty and his body, making him different.

But what was it?

And why did Jacob and his friends have to meet the Cullen's tonight? It didn't make any sense. None of this mad any sense.

I was thinking about this all the way out of Forks. I didn't even realize I was still sat in the comfy Volvo until Carlisle placed a ice cold hand on mine.

He parked the car at the edge of a forest, getting out and then suddenly appearing outside my door, opening it for me. I smiled at him in a thanks and then got out to stand beside him. The slamming of the door seemed to echo through the mist-covered clearing.

"Where is everyone?" I asked Carlisle as I strained to see any figures in the clearing. My poor human sight must be nothing compared to his set of vampire eyes.

"They are here, just a little further away. I can hear them. Olivia, Jack and Michael are getting ready for a fight, so they are ready in case things go bad."

I gulped and followed Carlisle through the mist.

I wondered for the first time if I really should be here. It had nothing to do with me, I had known that, well part of me had, the other part was completely blinded by curiosity.

Then I finally saw shapes when we got halfway across the field.

I forgotten how startlingly beautiful Olivia was. It hurt to even look at her. She had her beautiful hair tied back in a ponytail with a streak of mud down her cheek, her golden eyes glowing as she faced Michael.

When the two of them sprang at each other and crashed into one another, it sounded like to boulders smashing into one another. Very loud, so loud it stung my ears. I winced.

Carlisle led me to where a man with dark hair stood in the middle of the clearing, watching Olivia and Michael. He turned to look at us when we approached. Like Carlisle, he had move-stair good looks and the same soft golden eyes, but his gaze seemed guarded and tense as if he was waiting for something bad to happen. His eyes softened when he saw us walking over and he headed over to meet us half-way.

"Hello, you must be Esme." He said in a voice that had a hint of an English accent to it. I couldn't be sure if it was an English accent or not, I had never met an English person before, but I knew they sounded different from American people. All I knew was they drank tea.

I nodded.

"Esme, this is William, my father." Carlisle introduced us quickly before speaking to William. "When will they be here?"

"We have no idea, we were waiting for you to come so you could hear their thoughts."

Carlisle became still and had a look on his face that told me he was concentrating. Then he nodded, moving again. "Five minutes, or ten at the latest. Where are Rebecca and Jack?"

William gestured to the forest. "They'll be here in a moment."

When he spoke, two shapes appeared from the trees. I recognized the bulky, muscular shape of Jack instantly, even from this distance he looked huge.

The second figure wasn't familiar to me, so I knew it was Rebecca, the only Cullen I had never met before. Her body was small but curvy, her legs as thin as Sophia's. When she got closer I could see she had auburn hair that was curled, rolling past her shoulders and bouncing up and down when she walked in that graceful pace the Cullen's walked in. Her face was chalky-white as the others. When William wrapped one arm around her and kissed her forehead in greeting, she smiled and I spotted two dimples appear on her face. How did vampire haves dimples?

Her golden eyes looked around the field and landed not on me, which was actually a relief, but on Michael and Olivia, who were locked in combat trying to kkock the other one off balance and throw them to the ground.

I heard her sigh softly. "This is a time of peace, why are they fighting?"

Jack overheard her as he passed and gave a growl, stopping to answer. "Because the pack are always ready for a fight. We must be to." Then he walked on wards towards Olivia and Michael to watch them.

Sophia's lithe, slim figure was at the edge of the clearing and I saw her dart along the edge. I was postive I would never get over how fast they were, how they turned almost invisible with speed.

Then Rebecca's eyes rested on me. They were soft and kind, which was also a relief. "Hello,"

"Mom, this is Esme." Carlisle introduced me again.

Rebecca's smile widened. "It's nice to finally meet you Esme."

"It's nice to meet you as well." I said, finally managing to find my tongue.

"They're almost here!" Sophia called from where she was standing, and then suddenly she was by Rebecca's side.

Rebecca and William shared a glance before William cleared his throat. "Olivia, Jack!" He called and the two vampires instantly broke apart and, after grinning at each other, came over, bickering about who won.

Carlisle was looking at the trees opposite us with narrowed eyes and I turned to see what he was staring at.

I gasped.

A huge shape, outlined with silver, appeared from the shadows and stalked forward. It was hunched, ready to spring, it's shoulders rolling as it walked. It was as big as a horse, but had the body of a...no, surely wolves didn't get that big? Yes, they must do. I could tell this creature was a wolf.

It's fur was russet-coloured and thick. Its eyes were dark, burning with anger as it looked at us. Then it drew its lips back in a snarl, revealing a set of deadly, sharp, white teeth.

I shuddered.

I caught my breath when more wolves appeared behind it. I counted the bulky shapes in front of me. One, two, three, four, five...there were nine of them. And they were huge. If it ended in a fight, I didn't see any way how the Cullen's would win, they were clearly out numbered.

I then looked at the colours of the wolves. One was jet-black, almost blending into the shadows behind it, and was the second largest of the pack. Another had chocolate-brown fur. One was grey with darker spots, and another was a light grey, the moonlight making its fur glow so it looked more silver than anything else, without spots. There was a sandy-coloured one who was smaller and lither than the others, which watched us with beady black eyes that looked sparked with excitement rather than fear. There was also a orange-colored wolf with a lighter face, another brown with darker legs. Finally there was a white one. She was completely white, without a single fur of another color. Her eyes though, like the others, were black, and they somehow looked more menacing than the others.

The wolves were fanned out in a shape that made them look like geese flying south for the winter.

At the head of the group was the russet monster that towered over the others. By its side was the black wolf and the snow-white one. Then the sandy-colored one and the brown with the darker legs. The two greys were behind them, the spot-pelted one on the right, the silver one on the left. The one with the chocolate-brown fur and the orange-furred wolf was stood at the back, their ears pricked and their eyes watching us carefully.

Carlisle stepped forward after William nodded at him.

I watched as Carlisle walked over to stand in front of the russet-furred wolf. What he said next shocked me.

He greeted the wolf with a calm tone, yet the words he said still sent shivers down my spine.

"Greetings, Jacob."


	26. The treaty is over

Jacob?

No. There was no way this huge wolf was Jacob. It wasn't possible.

The wolf looked up at Carlisle and dipped its huge head slowly, as if answering. My eyes widened even more in shock.

"It would be much easier to talk if you said something. I'm not too good at reading a wolf's body language." Carlisle said in a smooth voice.

The wolf made a chuckling sound. "The great Carlisle Cullen not being good at something. Why I never!"

I froze. The wolf could speak? That wasn't what shocked me the most though, it wasn't what raised goosebumps on my arms and neck. It was the fact that I knew that voice. I would know it anywhere. It brought back a lot of memories, all happy ones. It was unmistakably the voice of Jacob Black.

This huge wolf was actually Jacob.

Then I remembered all the stories he had told me about his ancestors, about their history with the wolves, how they could become wolves as well. Werewolves. So vampires and werewolves existed. Was there anything else? Ghouls, witches, giants? What stuff was made-up, and what was really real?

I stared in shock, my lower jaw dropping. I quickly stopped it and closed it.

The wol turned to look at me. "Hey Esme."

Yes, this was Jacob. Those eyes, the brown-black ones that I had seen every day since I was one, were staring back at me. I was reflecting from their depths, and I was sure there was a glimmer of pain in his eyes as he looked at me standing with the Cullen's.

Then the white wolf bristled, making Jacob look away from me. Her voice was icy cold as she barked, "We are wasting time! The scent of vampire is burning my nose!"

The orange-coloured wolf nodded in agreement. "Yeah, it's disgusting."

My eyes narrowed. I had always thought that Carlisle and his siblings smelt fine. Then I looked at the nose on each wolf and knew their sense of smell was much better than mine. What did the Cullen's smell like to them? It was hard to imagine that even with a powerful nose, the Cullen's could ever smell so bad that their scent would be described as 'disgusting'.

"Luna, Regan, shut it!" The wolf that was as black as the shadows commanded in a voice than was echoed with impatience.

Both wolves just looked away, the white one flicking her ear.

Jacob looked back at Carlisle. "We need to talk about the treaty." He reminded.

Carlisle nodded. "I haven't forgotten. You can start."

Jacob rolled his eyes at the politeness in the offer. "Right. Well, remember there is a key point in the treaty? If any of you end a humans life, the there is no treaty and we are allowed to kill you."

Jack snickered. "You can try."

I had once found it hard to believe that anything could fight the Cullen's and have the faintest chance of winning. But now, as I looked at these huge wolves, I thought about how stupid I had been. They looked pretty capable of clawing the vampires apart, even though the thought made me shiver.

The white wolf, Luna I'm guessing was her name, lowered her head and answered with a low growl that echoed through the forest, making me wince.

William glared at Jack. "Let's try not to get anyone hurt tonight."

Jack didn't say anything, just kicked the ground with frustration.

Jacob spoke again, ignoring what had just happened. "We haven't forgotten that point."

"Why do you choose to bring it up now though?" Olivia asked through clenched teeth. She looked ready to launch herself at the wolves, stood in a half crouch, her eyes alert. I knew it wasn't because she wanted to fight to keep me safe, just for the thrill and the chance to attack one of the wolves in front of her.

"You guys are immortal, Esme is not." Jacob pointed out. "So, Carlisle, when she does die, we all know she will someday, what are you going to do?"

Carlisle's face twisted in pain.

Luna spat. "Probably thought he would get away with changing her."

The chocolate-colored wolf and the grey one with the darker spots shared a glance of horror. Regan, the one with the orange pelt, twitched his ears forward, waiting eagerly for the fight to break out. I noticed that two others felt the same way, the darker-legged brown one and the silver-grey female.

I looked up to see Carlisle's reaction to this.

He looked angry now. "I would never put her through that much pain!"

"So, when she does die, you'll just move on with your life, forget her completely as if she was only a memory?" Jacob pressed.

William stepped forward. "Jacob," His voice was as hard as stone. "This is none of your business, so just drop it."

A growl sounded from Jacob, louder than Luna's. "It is linked with the treaty, which is linked to my pack. So, as I am lead wolf of this pack, I think you'll find it has everything to do with me!"

Then Jacob turned his furious gaze back to Carlisle. "But there is nothing in the treaty saying that we can't fight you. I can spring at you right now. I can rip you apart to shreds." The thought alone made him smile. "What is stopping me from killing you right now?"

I couldn't take this any longer. I could see they were seconds apart from springing into battle. The wolves had already crouched down, their hackles raised and their fur bristling. Luna drew back her lips in a snarl and the silver-grey female gave a loud hiss.

I walked forward but cold hands stopped me and pulled me back. "You'll only get hurt," Rebecca whispered as she pulled me back to stand beside her.

"But what if they end up in a fight?"

"Carlisle can protect himself." Rebecca said although her voice shook. "They'll be fine. And who says it will end up in a fight? There is still a chance that we can sort this out without bloodshed."

Jacob's eyes tightened as he glared up at Carlisle still. "But that would be too easy."

"You think I am that beatable?"

"I can see that you would rather talk than fight. Your weak, Carlisle. You never liked violence, you still don't. It is going to be so easy to kill you."

"Jacob, think about this." William said. How did he keep his voice so calm? "You don't want your pack in danger,"

"They won't be in danger." Jacob sounded positive, and I knew the other wolves were feeling the same thing. "Besides, you didn't answer my earlier question. What will you do when she dies? Will you try to kill yourself as well?"

Carlisle's jaw locked. Beside me, Rebecca stiffened. I stared in horror as Jacob stood another step towards Carlisle.

I tried not to let the question bother me. But it did. The thought of Carlisle wanting to die made me feel awful. I had to make sure that he knew I wouldn't want him to leave his family, to hurt them so much, and die as well. My death shouldn't mean that much to him. We had only kissed about nine hours ago!

"Jacob, she's sixteen. Now is not the time to be thinking about her death." Carlisle hissed.

"He was just wondering when we could expect another vampire to join the Cullen's." Luna moved to stand beside Jacob's side. She lifted her muzzle. "I know you wouldn't let her die. You'll change her."

Jacob snarled. "You better not!"

"What if I choose it?" I said without thinking. They all turned to look at me. I swallowed. "I mean, surely its not against the treaty if the person wants to become a vampire."

"You want to become a vampire?" Olivia demanded, appulaed. "To be frozen in the body of a sixteen year old? To never die? To live through eternity the same?"

Carlisle sighed. "Esme,"

"No, I wouldn't want to be a vampire at sixteen. Of course not, that's too young. That means repeating school over and over again. I wouldn't become a vampire now, but maybe, if our relationship is still a relationship, which I know it will be, I would become a vampire later in life, when I was seventeen and eighteen."

Jacob started to bristle. "And you would let?" He spat at Carlisle.

"You asked the question Jake!" I said, wanting to move to stand with Carlisle but I knew Rebecca wouldn't let me.

He wasn't listening to anything. He looked back at Carlisle. "I knew it! I knew you didn't care about! You would allow her to become like you! To become a leech, a blood-sucker! A vampire! You make me sick! The treaty is over!"

The wolves didn't looked shocked, as if they had expected that. Besides, Jacob was the Alpha, they had to do what he said.

Carlisle's eyes narrowed. "What do you mean exactly."

"I mean that there is no treaty. We are allowed to kill you, no matter what."

"Jacob, as much as I would like to sink my teeth into you right now, I have to argue." Olivia shook her head. "Your risking your pack,"

The wolves bristled at that.

"We aren't risking anything! It's so easy to beat you guys!" Regan snarled.

Luna nodded. "We're faster, stronger, better."

"That's right. So watch out!" The silver-grey female spat.

"So your going to fight us now?" Jack laughed.

The wolves rolled their eyes.

"Not right now, but you can expect a fight soon." Jacob growled.

"Seriously?" Jack's eyes glistened at the idea. "I can't wait to beat you."

"You can try. Don't think so much of yourself. Your not the best fighter in this clearing."

"So no treaty?" Carlisle checked.

"Boy, your slow!" Jacob snorted. The wolves made a sound that was like they were laughing, but it was much darker.

Then Jacob looked at me. "I'm sorry it's come to this, Esme. But I have to do this. For them even thinking about changing you, it makes me sick. I can't let you become like them. You mean too much to me, to your brother. Think about Larry. What would he do if you disappear suddenly and never return? You could never see him again, you'll be too dangerous. Your be a danger to all humans. And its our job to protect every human we can from monsters like vampires. Its either fight against you and your friends now, or later, when you join them. Maybe if we get rid of them before that, you and your human days will be safe."

Without any word and before I could say anything, the wolves turned and walked away, melting into the shadows.


	27. Lets just live in the moment

To many things had happened in the space of that one day.

Number one: Carlisle had kissed me and we were now...dating, I guess. But it wasn't like dating for me. Not with Carlisle. It was something different, as in good different. It was much more deeper than any relationship I had ever had. He loved me, I knew that. He had said that once a vampire falls in love they never fall out of it. I would never stop loving Carlisle. He was perfect for me, my other half. Without him I would be lost. I needed him and he needed me.

Number two: I had met Rebecca and William. Like Carlisle had said, I hadn't expected to meet them so soon, but now I had I was glad I did. Rebecca seemed really nice and friendly, she had tried to protect me by pulling be back so I would be safer from the wolves. And William, I knew he was the leader, and Jacob had described him as a nonviolent person, someone who would rather sort things out through talking than fighting. They both cared about Carlisle a lot, I could see that.

Number three: This one had wounded me so badly. I knew I had lost Jacob as a best friend. He would never speak to me again, and if he did he would complain about the Cullen's, something that I wouldn't want to listen to, that I would pick silence over any day. He hated the Cullen's, and as long as I was in love with Carlisle he would hate me as well. His words had stung me like bees, always gettign worse and worse until they were unbearable. His parting words wounded me the most.

It was now four days after the meeting with the wolves - I didn't want to call them werewolves, wolves suited them much better - and I was on my way from English to the black Volvo that was waiting for me.

I had been used to people staring at me as I walked from class to class or in and out of school, but somehow the staring was worse this time. Whenever I was with or without Carlisle they would stare. And it wasn't like the stares I was used to. Sure, the girls had a little bit of jealousy, but it was like they were thinking 'why the hell did Carlisle pick her?' and I had been thinking that enough without having them sharing my thoughts as well.

Carlisle was leaning against his shiny car as I approached, a smile on his face. His perfect blonde hair was styled into a disary on the top of his head and the sunglasses blocked his golden eyes.

He walked oer and met me half way, wrapping one arm around me and pulling me into a kiss. A ssoon as our lips met I forgot about the people staring and watching us, I just thought about Carlisle.

"OK you two, get a room." Jack commented, grinning at us as he passed and jumped into Olivia's car, the others following him.

Carlisle and I broke apart but his arm remained around my waist. "I'll see you guys at home," He said before leading me to his car and opening the door for me.

On the way to my house, I had to ask. "Have the wolves caused any trouble lately?"

He shook his head. "No, they aren't nearby either, so I can't hear their thoughts. I know they are planning something, a big battle to get rid of us. Their hatred is blinding them, they can't see how stupid they are."

"Did you recongize any of them?" I asked.

He nodded. "They commonicate through their minds as well, they can hear each others voices as if they were speaking. It's like my gift, but they can reply you see. I know their names."

"Who were was the chocolate-colored one and the silver grey?"

"Quil and Leah,"

"The grey with the darker spots?"

"Embry,"

"The brown one with the darker legs?"

"Jared,"

"The black one?"

"Oh, that's Sam. He's what you might call the Beta of the pack. He's the oldest, but Jacob is the grandson of Ephriam Black, the last chief of the tribe. Jacob was born to be Alpha, so when he phased first the pack welcomed him as their leader. They listen to him and follow his orders. But Jacob is young, he's only been a wolf for a short amount of time, so he depends on Sam for guidence and help, and Sam was happy to agree. He's the second in command,"

It was easy to remember the wolves, what they had looked like. I wouldn't ever forget them. "The sandy-colored one?"

"Seth Clearwater. He's so young to become a werewolf, I guess it happened early because it was triggered by something, a lot of anger or sadness or something. He was looking forward to a fight, he wants to prove himself to the rest of the fight. Jacob doesn't want to involve him in a battle though, you see e and Seth have this bond, as strong as a bond between brothers. Jacob wants to keep him safe."

I nodded. I knew that Seth and Jacob were close friends and Jacob was always looking out for him.

"That Luna was quite a character, wasn't she?" Carlisle chuckled. "You know that once, there never used to be female were-wolves. Now there are three in one back, it's completely unheard of!"

"Three? I only saw Leah and Luna there." I said, confused.

"Jacob left some of his pack behind. There are fifteen in total."

"Fifteen!" I almost chocked.

"Yes. It's quite big for a pack. But I guess something happened that made more teenagers in La Push change. Whoever has the bloodlines from the last three wolves, Levi Uley, Quil Atera and Ephriam Black, are becoming werewolves."

"Who are the other wolves?"

"I don't know all of their names. Jacob thought about one of them - a young girl named Freya. Jacob was unsure about her. She was a lone wolf for a while, then joined the pack. I think she hates it there. She'd rather be alone."

"I know how that feels. Why should Jacob care about her though?"

"She is his cousin, and he is the pack leader."

"Wow, he didn't tell me aout his family, just his sister and dad." I shook my head before I could let the thought offend me. "Anyway, enough about the wolves."

"If you want to talk about you one day becoming a vampire, you can forget about it."

"Why?" That offended me more.

He glared at me, but he wasn't angry, his eyes were soft. "Why? Because we've only been together less than a week and you are already thinking about throwing away everything to become a vampire."

"I love you though."

"And I love you, which is why I have to disagree with this."

Offended again. "You don't want me to become a vampire?"

"I would love to be with you for all eternity. But to ask you give up everything, your family, your friends, your humanity, that would be so selfish of me, the most selfish thing I would ever do."

"I want to become like you."

"But Esme, think about it. Your brother needs you, your mother needs you."

I winced. "They have each other. Larry is smart enough."

"Your friends?"

"Doesn't matter as long as I am with you." I answered.

"And Jacob?"

I gulped.

"He'll hate you, Esme. He won't have any choice."

"He already hates me,"

"No, he doesn't. Not like he will if you become like us."

I shook my head. "Like I said, it doesn't matter. I want you, I want us, forever."

"And so do I. But we've only been dating for five days, maybe you should rethink that."

"Is that all its been? Just four days? I thought it must have been weeks, months even." He didn't say anything, so I continued. "Carlisle, none of those things matter to me as much as you do. I love you. I want you. Why can't you see that?"

"I can see it. That's what's killing me. It hurts to know that you want this so bad, that you are willing to give up everything to become a vampire. Your making the wrong choice."

"I don't think it is. It's the only choice. Its the only way I get you forever."

"Can't you see how much this is killing me? The mere thought of putting you through so much pain...it's unthinkable."

"But it's only for a few days, right? And we have the rest of forever."

"I'm not discussing this now, Esme."

I narrowed my eyes. "Why not?"

"Because it's too soon. Can't we just enjoy life now? Let's not think about it just yet."

"But I'm getting older every day. I want to be the same age as you."

"Then you have a good one and a half years left until you are my age."

"What?"

He shrugged. "I was lucky to pass as sixteen. Truth is, I'm eighteen."

"Oh,"

"Yeah, so we have plenty of time. We have plenty of time to get to know each other better, to make our relationship stronger, to live in the moment." He pulled the car up on the curb outside my house.

"And when I am eighteen, will you change me?"

He leaned forward and kissed me softly, trying to distract me. It kind of worked, but as soon as the kiss ended I remembered what I wanted and what he was arguing against.

Carlisle saw that his plan to distract me hadn't worked, and sighed. "Let's discuss that nearer the time. Let's just-"

"-live in the moment," I finished his sentence for him with a roll of my eyes. "Yes, so you've said."

He chuckled. "Can I come in?"

I nodded. "Sure, I have plenty of homework though."

"I'll help," He said.

Then he kissed me again.


	28. Singing before bowling

"I can't believe you are making me do this." Carlisle grumbled again as he pulled the car up outside the bowling alley.

I glanced at him and smiled. "You said you wanted to get to know me better. So I thought there was no better way to spend the last night of time than doing something I love and we can both enjoy. I love bowling."

He sighed. "Alright."

"I should warn you that the others are here."

"Oh, let's just add more witnesses to watch my embarrassment." He muttered.

I laughed. "You'll be fine. Emmett gets a bit competitive most of the time, but if you'd prefer we could have our own lane."

"You want to bowl with your friends though,"

I shrugged. "I bowl with them every Thursday. Tonight might be the only night you agree to this."

He chuckled. "OK, we'll bowl alone for one game, then maybe we can play again with the others, if my pride isn't completely gone by then."

I smiled. "OK, deal." Then I remembered something. "Oh, I should warn you, we aren't bowling straight away. Well, I'm not."

"I thought I would be the chicken." He teased. "Why?"

"Oh, it's nothing really. We um...well, Rosalie, Alice, Bella and I meet this girl I knew when I was little named Lindsay and because its always open-mic night on Thursdays, we always sing for half an hour. It's nothing really, I could try to talk them out of it for tonight."

He shook his head. "No, I'm fine with watching and listening. Is that why you are wearing a coat?"

I nodded. "Yep, it has my outfit underneath."

"Can I see?"

"You can, when we start singing. Are you sure your fine with that?"

He smiled and leaned over. "Of course I'm fine. Your a wonderful singer, Esme," Before I could disagree with the complement, his lips crashed against mine, silencing me.

A tap on the glass made up jump apart.

"Come on, love birds!" Edward laughed, Bella smiling at his side. "It's almost half past, Esme, time you girls went and got ready."

"He's right," Carlisle agreed, getting out of the car. I quickly undid the seat-belt and got out, almost hitting Edward with the car door in my haste.

Bella grabbed my arm. "Come on! Lindsay is waiting!" Bella and Lindsay were close friends, they had gotten along well from the first open-mic night and I knew she was eager to see her friend again.

"See you soon!" I waved to Carlisle before being led across the car park by a very excitable Bella.

We walked through the doors. Neon signs were hung up on the wall, shaped like those weird bus-car things from the 80's, peace signs, love hearts, music notes, famous artists like Elvis and Michael Jackson, waitress carried fizzing glowing drinks to different tables, the jukeboxes which provided the music until the open mic night started boomed loudly over the noise of the crowd. The bowling alleys had been lit up as well and the pins glowed in a luminous green. I could see the DJ getting set up.

Lindsay and the others were waiting for us in the back room. Lindsay rushed forward and gave us a huge. She went to a different school than us so we only saw her once a week and sometimes if we were lucky we would see her on the weekends as well whenever she wasn't staying with her dad in New York.

"Hey," She said. "Esme, Rosalie said you brought someone tonight! Who is he?"

"His name is Carlisle Cullen," Alice chirped before I had barely heard the question. "I'll point him out to you."

"Carlisle Cullen? Cullen, as in the son of Michael Cullen? Wow, is he as good looking as his father?"

Alice gasped, but her laughing prevented her from sounding serious as she said, "He's married!"

Lindsay smiled and shrugged. "I know, I'm just pointing out the obvious."

I quickly sorted out my hair, the wind outside hadn't helped, and put on the make-up I disliked so much.

"Almost ready?" Alice asked.

I nodded. "Yes, but do we have to wear these outfits? I feel so...I feel like I'm not wearing anything!"

"The guys like it," Rosalie shrugged.

I sighed and pulled off the coat. I was wearing a very short blue skirt and a matching top that was a little longer than a bikini top, stopping at the bottom of my chest, revealing my belly.

"Have you ever thought of piecing your belly button?" Rosalie asked me. She was wearing the same as me - we all were, apart from the colors of the top and skirt - her color was red.

"No," I said instantly, wincing at the idea of a needle.

She rolled her eyes. "It doesn't hurt. It just stings for a few hours, and then you don't feel it. Carlisle might like it."

I shook my head. "No, he wouldn't."

"I don't know why I bother. But you've pieced your ears, and your nose."

"That was a mistake, I have a pieced nose anymore."

"Whatever, I was just making a suggestion." She said before turning to Bella, probably asking her the same question.

Lindsay, wearing a green top and shirt, smiled and walked over to me. "So, what's this new boyfriend like? I swear you said you weren't going to date anyone for a while."

"That was before I knew about Carlisle," I said, putting on more lipstick than needed, then grabbing a tissue and wiping it neatly off.

"Esme, are you nervous?"

I bit my lower lip. Was it that obvious? "No,"

"Your a terrible liar, Esme."

"Carlisle says that as well," I said, smiling slightly at the memory.

"Then take his advice and just tell me the truth straight away." Lindsay said. "Now, why are you nervous?"

"It's the first time Carlisle has seen me sing a solo before, sure the others are with me in the background, but what if he doesn't like it? But that's not what I'm worried about the most. I'm worried about this." I pointed at the outfit. "What if he things I'm some sort of slut or something?"

She sighed. "If he loves you, he won't think that."

Alice came back in, clapping excitedly. "It's time! It's time, it's time, it's time!" She called before leaving the room again, still clapping.

Lindsay raised her eyebrows. "She has too much energy,"

I nodded in agreement. "I know,"

In under five minutes we were walking onto the stage, taking our places and holding the microphones.

Of course, when the music started playing, I found Carlisle and concentrated on him and the music, forgetting my nerves and what I looked like. I really did hope he didn't mind the short skirt and top.

The DJ made a good selection of songs for us to sing, lucky we all knew all the words (we did listen to a lot of music).

First of all it was 'The Sound of the Underground' followed by 'Ego' by the Saturdays and then 'Echo' by Girls Can't Catch and then more and more.

When I was finished I got off of the stage and headed straight for Carlisle. He looked over his shoulder and smiled when he saw me.

"You were wonderful." He said, putting his cold hands on my waist and kissing me. "You sounded wonderful, and you look wonderful, although maybe I shouldn't be so surprised, you always look wonderful."

I smiled and felt warm all over by that. "Thanks, do you want to start bowling?" I asked.

"Can I do something first?" He requested.

I nodded. "What is it?"

He put on finger under my chin and lifted my face up so our eyes met.

"This," He said before leaning down and sealing our lips together.


	29. Six months later

"Keep your eyes closed," Carlisle instructed as he led us forward. Where we were exactly was a mystery to me, all I knew was that he wanted to cheer me up.

All these six months, I had been constantly worrying. Where was Jacob? Were the wolves still trying to plot how they would kill the Cullens? I knew that if either the side looses, if either side dies, I would be hurt. I would be sad. It was either Carlisle and the Cullen's, my boyfriend and the ones he loves, or my best friend and his friends. Either way, lives would be lost - lives I needed to stay with me until I died, the lives that belonged to the people I need.

In these past six months, I knew I was causing Carlisle pain. He hated seeing me like this. I would jump at every sound, stare out of the window during lessons and at lunch time, not eating much, just nibbling on an apple.

Then, just now as we had been driving from school, he had suddenly announced he wanted to show me something and driven towards the east. I had been too busy looking out of the window without even noticing what we passed as we drove off the main road, was only surprised when he finally stopped the car. As soon as I stepped out he took my hand and told me shut my eyes. I only managed to get one glimpse around and saw only brown and green.

"Don't open yours eyes until I tell you to." He whispered softly.

"Are we almost there though?" I asked. I was dying to open my eyes to see what the big deal was. Where were we? What was he going to show me? What was going on?

"Almost, just be patient for a few more minutes, please."

I nodded a little and he led me forward. I listened to the sounds around me. What was that singing? A bird? OK, so we were in a place with birds. And leaves. I could hear leaves.

Then he finally stopped. "Alright, you can open your eyes now."

I blinked open my eyes and looked around, gasping at what I saw, my eyes widening in amazement. In front of me was a clearing, a beautiful one. It was like it had been designed for a movie, or by a famous gardener that had taken fifty years to create something this beautiful. The grass was a beautiful shade of green, covered in dots of color, different flowers of pink, purple, blue, yellow and red. The trees along the outline of the clearing were oak trees, strong and proud. I could hear the rumbling of the river not far away from here. This clearing was much smaller than the one we had met the wolves in, but I preferred this one.

I took a step forward, well aware that my hand was in Carlisle's and he was watching me carefully.

"This is amazing!" I told him, looking back at him and smiling widely.

His eyes glistened with disbelief. "You like it?"

I nodded enthusitcally. "I love it! How can anyone not love this place? It's amazing!"

"I'm glad you like it. I thought we should have a place we could go to so we can talk and get away from all the drama. I found this while I was hunting with Michael, and seeing as he didn't find it interesting, I came back the next day to have a closer look. I wasn't sure if you would like it or not, I wasn't sure if you were an outside person who liked nature or you would just see it as another clearing. I'm glad you like it, Esme."

I stared at the clearing again. "Wow,"

"What do sit down?" He asked and I nodded. We moved to the middle of the clearing and sat down in the grass. I started plucking strands out of the ground, counting them and creating a small pile beside me.

"Are you OK, Esme?" He asked me, instantly worried, seeing the distant look on my face.

I nodded. "Yeah, just fine."

"Come on Esme. I may not be able to read your thoughts, but I know when you are sad, I can read it on your face. What's wrong?"

I sighed, giving in. "I was wondering, thinking about something very important."

"What was it?" He pressed, taking my hand and stroking the back of it with his cold thumb.

"I was hoping that this thing with Jacob wouldn't end in a fight. Maybe if we spoke to the wolves - if I could speak with them, we could end this before it ends up with someone getting hurt."

Carlisle's jaw locked. "No."

"Why not?" I demanded.

"It's too dangerous. Werewolves can't control their anger. You'll be in danger the whole time, they are always a risk. I couldn't stand it if you got hurt."

"Translation: I would kill any werewolf who lays a claw on you." I said with a roll of my eyes.

"Yes, but is that such a crime, that I care about you? Your being really cool about this hope of hanging out with werewolves."

I shrugged. "I have hung out with them for years, remember? They never hurt me there, never even...how do you put it? Phased? Yes, that's the word."

"I still think that its a bad idea for you to talk to them unprotected."

"If you came, they would become hostile. Jacob would never hurt me."

"He said your friendship was over."

I winced at the memory. "Yes, but he doesn't mean that, not completely. He still wouldn't hate me."

"How can you be so sure?"

"We have been best friends for sixteen years."

He sighed again. "Let's not argue over the matter. Let us sort this out, and if we think it is going badly, then, only then, can you talk to them. Do we have a deal?"

I knew that he wouldn't have it any other way, that my argument was pointless, so I nodded. "Yes, fine."

He wrapped one arm around my waist and lay me down on the grass beside him. I rested my head on his chest.

"While we are in this clearing, we don't talk about the werewolves, about anything going wrong, unless for you it is urgent and upsetting you. Let's just focus on the good things in life, OK?"

I nodded.

So I forgot about the werewolves, pushed them to the back of my head. Although the know that they were still there was there, I was focusing on Carlisle, because he was the best thing that had ever happened in my life.

I thought about the past eight months, missing out the parts with the werewolves, of course. I thought about how Carlisle and I had affected each other, how happy we were together.

But how long would our happiness last?

* * *

**This is the last chapter of Starlight, but I will be continuing the story in the sequel which will be called Dark Moon. I hope you enjoyed this story**

**Spoiler: In the next book, there is more wolves!**

**:D **


	30. Twitter

**DISCLAIMER: I Do Not Own Twilight Or It's Characters, I Only Own This Story And The Idea For It**

* * *

Please follow me on twitter - /emily_esme

i had to make a new account cos my old one started to act up xx


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